I've had issues with depression my entire life. Over the years I have had ups and downs but recently, it has been unbearable. I graduated college several years ago and due to the economy I have not found a stable job yet. The majority of the people around me seem to be happy and are getting what I have always hoped and worked for. I cant help but feel a little jealous. At this moment I find myself once again laid off. It has gotten to the point that I don't want to get out of bed anymore or look myself in the mirror. I feel like I wasted years of my life. I'm told that I'm being dramatic but no one really knows how worthless I feel every single day. A few months ago I started to develop of fear of sleeping at night. I don't know what to do anymore. I would love to go to therapy but the insurance I can afford will not cover it. I started to notice that I'm a horrible person to be around. I'm trying so hard to get out of this funk but little things will trigger me off and I get all pissy then cry uncontrollably. I know deep down with this situation I cannot control my own life and it scares me.