Have you ever tried to talk to her about that?
I agree. As much as you feel it's what you want there is a part of you that knows it's not right or going to help you. If you are worried about your parents then talk to your gp. They can refer you to a therapist or counsellor. Like mentioned before just tell your parents that you are starting to struggle with some issues and that with a little professional help you can get through them. Telling them nothing at all just makes matters worse as you will be paranoid about what they might think or find out from someone else. And as a Mom I know how grateful I would be to know that you recognize you need to talk to someone rather than you holding it in. If you are still in school try talking to the counsellor there. Dont have to give huge details but just enough so that they might be able to refer you to other resources. Good luck.