I want to cut so bad!

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Jewel 24, Apr 7, 2008.

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  1. Jewel 24

    Jewel 24 Active Member

    Its the only way I know of to let all the feelings that are building up inside out. There is so much turmoil on the inside of me and I just want it out. I tried screaming but that didn't help. I tried breaking things but that didn't help either. I tried punching the walls and kicking things around. That didn't help either. I feel like I am about to explode. I cannot express this feeling that is so strong inside of me! And I know that cutting is only temporary relife and if I start cutting again (it has been 3 yrs) then I am only going to want more and more. I don't know what to do I need help. I feel like swallowing some pills and I am not sure if its because I want to die or if its me just wanting to hurt myself. I just NEED HELP! :argh:
     
  2. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    yep, i totally know how you feel. that's why i cut sometimes too, just to try and release all those built up feelings inside of me.

    just DON'T cut though. you seem like you know that it just a temporary release. you end feeling worse afterwards, guilty,ashamed, ostrasized from other people with trying to hide the scars. you'll feel miserable when your arm's stinging and throbbing the next day but you can't even tell anyone about it.

    i know it's hard but just try and get your feelings out in other ways, go for a run, punch more stuff (i know you've already tried all this but keep doing it until you get your emotions expressed)
     
  3. Jewel 24

    Jewel 24 Active Member

    Thank you for the advice. I am trying to hold off a little while longer and comtemplating whether or not I should call the crisis line. I am feeling very impulsive and I am afraid that I am going to do something I did not intend to so. either hurt myself really bad or do some serious damage to my dad's howc in which I case I won't have to worry about hurting myself anymore b/c he'll do that for me!
     
  4. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    Call it! It sounds like you're really upset and frustrated, to talk to someone, tell them how you feel, would not only distract yourself for a while but it would help you to express yourself.
    I think you need to talk to someone about how you're feeling, especially if you're worried that you might seriously harm yourself.
     
  5. Jewel 24

    Jewel 24 Active Member

    I think I will do that! Thank you Transmission!
     
  6. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    :hug:
     
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