I want to die.

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Amber, Jul 31, 2008.

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  1. Amber

    Amber Active Member

    This might be triggering.

    I think my bf is cheating on me. I am so afraid.

    My life is going nowhere.

    I just want it to end.

    I know where <mod edit: Robin - method>.. and I have a different plan too.

    I want to put a <mod edit: Robin - method>. just fall asleep. fade away.. and be forgotten in a week.. or less.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 31, 2008
  2. Shadowlands

    Shadowlands Official SF Hugger Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    :hug: Why do you think your life is going nowhere? Just stay strong! :hug:
  3. Robin

    Robin Guest

    Hey Amber, welcome to the site :) Am sorry you're feeling really low, it's scary to knowing your loved one is playing the field, exacerbates the feelings of worthlessness tenfold, worse still when you depend on them.

    Although we can't offer a fix for your life we can offer you friendship, if you need a friend just drop me a pm :) :hug:
  4. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    What's your reason for thinking your life is going nowhere? Don't give up ok.
  5. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Killing yourself over your cheating boyfriend is just not worth it. Your life is worth so much more than that.
  6. Alone613

    Alone613 Active Member

    I understand. I want to die also. Every day, I wonder why I wasn't left DEAD two years ago in the ER. I have not yet once awakened, not for one day, and been glad that my heart was re-started, that my lungs were stimulated into breathing, that I was dead as I wanted to be, and it was taken away from me.

    It is up to you only to decide what is worth living for, or not living for. The only thing that keeps me going are the friends who know that I'm suicidal who are always making me promise to not "do it again". Not least of all are my 11 grandchildren - and one more on the way, plus an important life event and celebration for two of my grandchildren at the end of this summer. My husband left me two years ago, after thirty-eight [!!!!!] years of marriage. It's now 40 years and he hasn't yet filed for divorce. He told our children that I asked for a divorce which was the biggest lie. HE is the one who was always threatening me with a divorce whenever he wanted what he wanted, when he wanted it. How my children can believe him is beyond me; they both know how much he has lied, and lied, and lied in past. They took sides because he got to them with a lie before I could get to them with the truth - which they don't want to believe. I just don't understand it. My son has been saying he has no mother for two years now and won't even tell me why he's mad. He never even talked to me after his father's lie! And now - he won't let me have any contact with his kids. My daughter, with whom I had always been so close, a girl who had always been so sweet and bubbly, is as cold and icy, as tough and unfeeling as a stranger. I don't know her anymore. I also don't know what else her father has been saying to her - he lives with her and her family.

    I literally can't stand going to my daughter's house because HE is there. My doctor has me doouble up on meds just before I go there so that I won't end up retching and vomiting when I see HIM. Do I want to "let him win" people ask me? Hah! He already HAS won, and I simply want to die. He has the whole family turned against me. I just don't know how much longer I can stand this.

    Should I kill myself over a husband of 40 years? Should you kill yourself over your cheating boyfriend? To any person who hasn't been through this, the answer looks simple. "No." To the person suffering the humiliation and embarrassment, well, sometimes the world doesn't look the same way to us as it does to other people who are not wounded.

    I will say this - if you are young, and there is plenty of time to find someone who is worthy of you, killing yourself over this one obviously unworthy slob would be a horrible thing. You have the rest of your life - most of your life - to look forward to. You can still have a family. I am alone. My family has deserted me. I am 63 and there is nothing to which I can look forward in my life. At 63, one does not start over. I'm sure there's someone out there who could set me straight on that, but it's the way I feel right now. I loved my husband until he wrung it out of me, until about one year ago, after I was diagnosed with an ulcer. I see other men his age, and frankly, I don't see anything out there to which I'd be attracted. They all look like a bunch of dirty slobs, like my STBX.

    Don't die over this one worthless person. Begin again, but first, mourn the loss of this boyfriend completely, as if he had died. Go through the stages of grief, and then begin again with your future before you.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 31, 2008
  7. Kimi

    Kimi Well-Known Member

    Please stay here.. He could be just playing a game...

    I was played games from a person who I loved. I didn't know he love playing games... His actions made me to lose a precious life and my life is going to be end as a result of what he has done to me over three years... He went back to the relationship he had.. Now he has been fantastic life with her by hurting and shuttering whole my life and my precious one's life...

    So he probably loves only you... he possibly come back to you... he probably doesn't care about the cheating one at all..

    Hang on and don't do anything..
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 2, 2008
  8. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Don't kill yourself over your bf hun, you are so much better than him. He isn't worth it! Noone's life is pointless , we're all here for a reason, therefore of course your life is going somewhere. Life is a journey and sometimes we don't think that we're going anywhere btu then soemthin comes along and make it better.
    You can make it thru this :hug:
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