I want to do it soon!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ColdSummer, Mar 8, 2008.

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  1. ColdSummer

    ColdSummer Well-Known Member

    I want to kill myself as soon as possible. Unlike many on here, I have several methods to you and the easy access to these. It could happen so easy. So why the fuck can't I just do it? I need some inspiration or something!:mad:
    People messge me on here asking how to do it, they dont have the resources to do it, as much as they'd like them. then I sit here, with several things and I dont do it. I some how feel like I'm letting them people down, im such a coward. I put everything off in life, from phoning people to essays to killing myself! argh
    Can someone talk to me please?
     
  2. alexander

    alexander Active Member

    a coward for not ending your life lol, it's funny and I say this honestly, I'd say your hero for not ending your life, the reason your not doing it is because deep inside you have the will to live and the courage to go on in the face of adversity, thats makes you a brave person not a coward, it's what makes people like us stronger than many of the so called normal people around us.
     
  3. Mortem

    Mortem Well-Known Member

    Yeah, I recognize that. I too have access to a myriad of methods. Work with a lot of heavy machinery, heights, owns weapons and explosives etc. Still, I know I won't do it today nor tomorrow. But then I ask myself... what's the rush?

    Doesn't matter when to me, I feel pretty done with life, but I won't rush things. I'll sell off all my stuff, leave everything clean and tidy, and bypass the grieving relatives-dilemma first.
    Then I'll have a go at it. :tongue:

    Do you feel apathy/loss of motivation?
     
  4. ColdSummer

    ColdSummer Well-Known Member

    yes I dont feel motivated to do it lol that sounds funny, but I have no motivation to do anything these days ...
     
  5. famous.last.words

    famous.last.words Forum Buddy

    not commiting suicide doesnt make you weak. it makes you strong, it means you have some fight left. embrace that.
     
  6. BioHomocide

    BioHomocide Well-Known Member

    Well it sounds like you want to die, but you are afraid to kill yourself.
    A lot of people are like this. Anyone can be suicidal, it is usually the people who don't regret anything that kill themselves in the end.

    Embrace life and find your meaning. Not everyone is happy, don't let plastic smiles fool you.
     
  7. Mortem

    Mortem Well-Known Member

    I'm afraid I dunno any magic recipe to bring back the motivation. For myself it seems to come in waves really. However, I know ONE thing that sort of pushes in the right direction... proper sleep. At least that works for me.
     
  8. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    I want to do it soon. But Im not doing it still. Why? Because Im afraid. Im not afraid to die, Im afraid of how to do that and from the fact that I might not succeed. So, I am a coward, I just have to get over this fear, and than everything is gonna be OK. I know there is no poing in going on, sometimes we must accept defeat, and that is not cowardly. Im also afraid of hurting my family, so, this is probably main reason that I still havent try to do something.
     
  9. Hurted

    Hurted Well-Known Member

    You are not coward... Im really happy that you are not brave enough, nobody here would want you to die...
    Just keep the faith!:hug:
     
  10. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    Faith? What faith?
     
  11. Dreamer uk

    Dreamer uk Well-Known Member

    Hope?

    I am barely hanging on myself, things are getting very tiring now, but I still have a tiny bit of hope, plus it would upset my mom. Although I'm gonna end up homeless on the street in loads of debt before long so when that happens I'll be saying my farewell to this world.

    I too have studied how to do it and I have a number of methods to go but I'm not happy about any of them in one way or another.

    Life has never been easy.

    My one salvation is the antidepressants I've started taking recently. Hopefully these will make me happy to live as a tramp on the street and thus not commit suicide or they'll make me emotionally flat enough to carry through with it when the time is right. I'm just a complete loner, I barely open my mouth each day to talk, if I killed myself my body would be rotting here for months before somebody noticed the smell, nobody really cares.

    lol You think you're good at putting things off, you ain't seen me in action, I'm the worlds best procrastintor. I cut things that close to the deadline that half the time it becomes impossible to save the situation. I just doom myself.

    Please just keep going in this life as long as you can.

    My message box is always open if you want to talk about the way you're feeling.

    Take care
     
  12. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    These 2 things are still keeping me alive. But, I wish to loose this tiny bit of hope. Everything will be easier then...
     
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