the only reason i havent done it yet or why im not doing it now is because i dont have a method. if i had a foolproof method i wouldnt even be typing this now, i would be fcuking dead. i cant talk to anyone, i have no one to turn to. i used to hvae my roommate but she has her own shit to deal with and cant deal with myp robelms and last semester she was depressed and shit and her grades went down and evyerhint g because of ME. it was my fucking fault and i just feel guilty. i cant deal with anything in my life and i just want it to be fcucking over. i fuckning hate this and i dont know what else to do. i have no idea. please help me. i just need to talk to someone. i want to talk to my roommmate so badlhy but i cant put her through this again. i cant. im fucking terrified right now. i want to fucking leave and never come back. im about to fucking run away because i dont have a way to kill myself and i dont know what else to do. i jutst want to run away from my problems. i hate everything in my life so much right now. there is nothing in my life worth living for. and the worst part is. my roommate, who i trust more than anyone else and also the only person who is home right now/avaialable for me to talk to, doenst want to fuckng talk to me because ive already stressed her out too much and she cant deal with me anymore.