I want to hurt people emotionally. I want revenge.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by palmtrees, Dec 9, 2008.

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  1. palmtrees

    palmtrees Well-Known Member

    Usually I'll just stop talking to or associating with people for a long time but most of the time they hardly notice or don't care, it's just way too passive aggressive. I want to hurt people, make them cry, make them hate themselves like they've done to me.

    For example, if a certain female friend of mine ever breaks up with the guy she's currently dating, I want to ask her out, get her infatuated for awhile and then break her fucking heart inexplicably. I want to embarass and humiliate my douchebag former friends at our ten year high school reunion and have everybody laugh at them. I want to get successful to the point where people who don't talk to me act like they're my best friend and then tell them "Fuck off, losers. You're not even fit to be in the same room as me."

    Part of me is repulsed by some of these thoughts but another part feels really good about them. Sometimes they're the only things that keep me going. I don't really know what to think about all that.
  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Instead of spending all that time and energy trying to exact revenge, be a better person than they are. Revenge may seem bittersweet at the time but it really isn't. Why stoop to their level. Do you really want to become what you hate?
  3. palmtrees

    palmtrees Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the comment. Yeah I know, I'm not sure doing any of the revenge stuff would make me feel any better, it would probably make me feel worse. But at least there's a result, a payoff. I've been the better person, I already am the better person, but it's not like there's any catharsis from that. It's not like being 5 years old where a teacher or parent punishes the other person for doing something wrong and I feel good about it. There's no closure.
  4. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    You should be more concerned about getting your own life sorted out. Don't waste yout time living for other people. You will always come across people who you don't get on with. Use your energy in a constructive manner. Best wishes.S.
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Revenge won't solve anything hun. You need to come to terms with the past and move on :hug:
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