I want to stop cutting... :(

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by depressedGirl, Feb 26, 2009.

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  1. depressedGirl

    depressedGirl Well-Known Member

    I really do. I am sick of the scars and me having to hide them. It is the only thing that keeps me alive though. If I try to stop I feel suicidal. I am scared that I will commit suicide if I stop cutting. I am going counselling Tuesday but she doesn't help me. Am I a loony and can I stop cutting? I know I need help. I had to have a blood test to see what tablets are in my blood and the nurse pulled an evil look at my scars. I feel that I am addicted to cutting. I have tried to take my mind of it. I can't.
  2. Rachel123

    Rachel123 Well-Known Member

    You aren't a looney :hug:
    I can relate.
  3. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    You're not a loony, and if you fight hard enough you CAN stop cutting.

    It sounds like, for you, cutting is a coping strategy to deal with whatever is going on that makes you feel bad, and it keeps those bad feelings at bay. That's something that many self harmers describe.

    In my eyes, in your situation, there are probably two areas to look at when it comes to wanting to stop.

    In the short term you have to find a positive way to release all those negative feelings. It might be through art, writing, talking to people, dance, or in anyway that you can communicate in a positive way. It might be that you need to simulate the feelings you get when you self harm. For example, if you like the pain, try things like ice cubes, or pinging an elastic band on your wrist, if the blood is important, maybe try that fake blood, or red ice cubes, or ketchup. If you like to see the marks on your body try drawing on yourself with a non toxic pen (red, if that helps). Another way is to try and release the energy in a physical way like exercise, hoovering, running, cycling, skipping, boxing, until you are so tired that the urge has eased.

    The other side of the coin is that you do need to look at the long term issues that cause you to feel so vile. It's great that you are having professional support, however, not so great that it doesn't help. Do you know what it is that stops it helping? Is it the type of therapy? The therapist? Maybe you're not opening up? Maybe you're expecting too much too soon? Wrong place? Wrong time of day/week? Maybe it might help to look at why you feel it's not working, and what you could hope to change to help therapy work for you.

    Do you have any other support other than the therapist?
  4. depressedGirl

    depressedGirl Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the tips. I have never tried some of them. I did try the ice cubes and elastic bands but all the rest I didn't. Thanks.
    I do have my Mum and Brothers to talk to but my Dad isn't interested. He keeps saying I am suicidal which I suppose can be true depending on my moods, Any way I think counselling is help a bit but it doesn't really take away my feelings. I could talk for ages and nothing ever changes. I still hate life. Anyway thats in the wrong catorgory. Thanks for the tips and will try them out.
  5. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Counselling won't take away your feelings, but with time it can help you tolerate them or deal with them in more positive ways than you are currently. There are many different types of therapy and even more therapists and it can take a while to find the right one for us. Maybe you could talk to your therapist about how you feel in terms of therapy not working very well for you right now.

    Also, the suggestions I gave are just a few, there are hundreds out there. It's not easy or quikc to beat self harming, but it can be done, and the more you fight, the more you succeed. Well done you for wanting to stop, that's the first step :)
  6. antmiles

    antmiles Member


    Although you say you feel suicidal, the fact you are scared you will commit suicide shows that you probably won't. I've been going through the exact same thing this last couple of weeks. I've felt suicidal on and off for years but far worse recently. I had the urge to cut my wrists, etc. but was worried that I'd actually die from it, so I just had to get out the house and go for a walk to stop myself from doing it. It's more of a want to be noticed I suppose...

    It's a good thing that you do want to stop, I hope you can manage it!

    (I'm new here woop)

  7. Epical Taylz

    Epical Taylz Well-Known Member

    hey hun :hug:
    im going through similar situations

    exercizing helps and so does writing
    therapy helps me, you just have to
    find someone who's willing to listen
    and who you feel comfortable with.

    being a girl, i dont feel comfortable
    with girl therapists. maybe you could
    try a different gender, that could make
    all the difference.

    :hug: youll get through this
    we're here to help :D
  8. depressedGirl

    depressedGirl Well-Known Member

    I haven't been doing so well. Scrapping my hand on the wall and cutting etc. I understand however if you want to give up on me. Anyhow thanks for the support
  9. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    It's a journey, sometimes it's easy, sometimes its hard, sometimes you go forwards, sometimes you go backwards, or deviate from the path you want. Sometimes you get lost.

    Wherever you are on your journey though, you will have support here, so please always remember you can ask for it if you need it.
  10. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    also doing exersice till u are tired of exersicing helps a lot:D
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