I was always the child my Parents never really cared about.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by SeperatedOne, Apr 11, 2011.

  1. SeperatedOne

    SeperatedOne Active Member

    Just thinking about things, I'm wondering did they ever care for me at all?
    I've been beaten up, bullied, teased and abused, because of it I find it hard to trust people, to get close with them, when I need my Parents the most to protect me, to help me, there is no one.

    They probably wouldn't even notice if I was gone.

    I mean, I've set out in trying to do my best and to please my Mum and Dad, I've always wanted to make them proud of me but it just feels like there is nothing there, no love, nothing.

    My little brother get's all their attention (along with my twin sister) because he's the youngest AND he's ill. My sister because she's just so wonderful and amazing, but me... I can't do shit, I'm useless in their eyes and that feeling really does get to me.

    To be honest, I don't know what I want from them, I've gotten use to the feeling but it hurts thinking about it, maybe it's too late to change things, maybe I don't want change, I'm so confused I don't know what I want. I just want to feel loved I guess.
     
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    :hug:

    Have you tried to talk to your parents about this?
    It doesn't have to be confrontational, just a simple "do you love me" should suffice, if that doesn't start a "why do you ask" conversation then there's something wrong.
     
  3. SeperatedOne

    SeperatedOne Active Member

    I've tried loads of things, I've left them little notes in the morning - the normal I love you stuff, presents, talking to them, trying to get them to notice me, etc....

    It's hopeless, I don't know why I'm trying to hard.
     
  4. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    But have you asked them flat out?

    I'm a mum and I would hate to think my son didn't know how precious and loved he is.
     
  5. SeperatedOne

    SeperatedOne Active Member

    I've tried but got confused and couldn't say anything.
    It's easier said than done.
     
  6. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    I raised a child with special needs and it still breaks my heart how much time it robbed me of my other child. My other child out of concern for worrying never told me. She still doubts that others love her to this day.

    I found out from my mom that the reason I did not get as much attention was because I was the strong one who did so much to help that she never realized I felt this way. My sister was special needs too. I struggled with feeling unloved for a long time.

    Please talk to them and tell them you feel out of the loop of being able to do things with them. Perhaps your mom or dad can go somewhere (even for an ice cream) and have some one on one time with you each week. They could take turns so one can stay with the other children.

    Who knows, it may prove to be some needed get away time for them too.

    I hope you feel better.