I was so close

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ace, Jun 11, 2009.

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  1. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    This morning I was so close why didn't I do it,and I was ready to go also that train was coming and I was confident also.I regret only not having done what I should've,screw this world I'm done Goodbye all hope you all find peace.I can't take this pain anymore,I need my permanent peace.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hey Ace,

    I'm glad you didn't go through with it Ace.
    You only get one chance, one opportunity, might as well make the most of what you've been giving.
    You don't have to die to find that 'permanent peace'. You just have to figure out what would make make your life better, even if its only small things, work little by little and watch your progress grow :hug:
  3. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Sorry dc thank's for your kind,warm supporting words but I can't take this anymore I just can't I've tried long anough years of endless suffering I've made my choice I have to and will do this.I'm really struggling so bad and have been for so long,I can't play "the game of life" anymore,I just can't death means so much to me I need that asap.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Please call your doctor Ace, is there any way you can call them right now?
    I think you need to. You don't have to suffer like this. :( :hug:
  5. illustration

    illustration Member

    Hey I hope you decide not to go through with it :)

    A train you say? funnily enough I get the train a lot and think about throwing myself in front of it.. a lot, the problem being that the train is always to slow by the time it gets to me!! :rofl:
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I'm glad you didn't. :hug:
  7. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Ace i am glad to see you are still here. You have survived the past three years while going through some very rough times. Don't let your fight be for nothing. You have proved to us and yourself that you can make it through these awful feelings. You are a survivor with more credit than you give yourself. It takes courage to continue. i am proud of you for making it this far. Maybe now is the time to seek professional help. You do not have to do this alone. :hug:
  8. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    Glad you are still with us Ace. Don't give up on life now after fighting against these feelings for so long. You can move beyond how you are feeling now even though that may seem not to be the case at the moment. You have people hear who care about you.
  9. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    I've gotten in contact with my Dr but still I feel and want to do something,it gives me comfort to see the ending.Thankyou for all the encouraging messages,I'm planning on going tonight hopefully or tomorrow for sure I need to do this can't take this pain anymore so sorry everyone thankyou for everything:sad:.
  10. Elysia

    Elysia Member

    I feel the same. Wish I could help you or say something useful. I guess its just know that you are not alone. I'm going through it too right now. Just sending you a hug
  11. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Ace you said you got ahold of your doctor...What did he/she say?? Right now you need help to get you thru this rough time..If things are that bad then go to the hospital.. You can't fight this on your own, and no one wants any harm to come to you!! Please seek the help if only to keep you safe from your self until this passes..You have alot of friends on the forum talk to them and take the support they have to offer..Take care!!
  12. pisces

    pisces New Member & Antiquities Friend

    I'm new here my brother nearly went thru with his plans last week i sat up all night with him until the urge passed letting him talk i know it changed nothing but not being on your own is important,is there no one there could do that for you, if not stay on here and you wont be alone,x
  13. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Thankyou everyone for your concern it's greatly appreciated and really flattering,I'm going to see my Dr but my mind is made up.I can't take this anymore,I get too much comfort out of ending it all.I can't take life anymore the pain of everything,I lay in bed thinking of the final moments and it gives me great comfort thank's everyone but I've come to my end:sad:.
  14. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest


    Yes...you have come to an end. But what end should you choose.

    Give up and give in to the illness that has afflicted us. Give up and give in, while you are weak and crippled.

    Or stand up, dust the dirt off of yourself, walk your sorry butt down to the er, or call 911.

    Fight man.....Come to an end of the pain, come to an end of the misery, but NOT by doing that. Come to a beginning of a new life. Come to DAY ONE that NOBODY IS GOING TO LET ACE STOP ACE FROM GETTING BETTER.

    You can, you will and you must get better. Do it for your friends. Do it for your family, hell, do it for us, BUT MOSTLY DO IT FOR YOU!

    Don't give in. If you give in now, you will be doing so while you are not in the right state of mind.

    I made up my mind a long time ago, that if an when I decide to end it, I will do so when I know my mind is healed and not broken.

    Your mind is broken. You have a broken brain. Go to the hospital and get it taken care of, just like a person would do for a broken arm.

    You can, and this will get better.
  15. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Thank's alot for your real encouraging post fps,I just can't do this anymore at all there's too much hurt inside me really.The pain is so overwhelming to bare,I just wan't this over and done with really sorry I'm feeling so rotten I wan't this so over and will have to do this sorry:sad:.
  16. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    I don't mean to bump up an old thread,but I tried to hang on a bit longer but to no avail I can't take this pain anymore and tonight seems a good time for it Goodbye everyone thank's for everything:sad:.
  17. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    why now when you have come so far. You have friends here who care how do you think you will be helping them by this. I hope you have called for help and are in hospital right now. Please think people to care about you the pain is nothing new you have worked through this before be strong now for you and your friends show others it can be done.
  18. Tired and alone

    Tired and alone Well-Known Member

    If I can hang on for a while longer, so can you. I don't know you but I believe in you. I believe that you have strength enough to hold on. I need friends right now and I thought that you could be one of those that could help me just by being there.
  19. christian_1990

    christian_1990 Well-Known Member

    relax, drink a beer smoke something
  20. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the kind thoughts,I try my best to change things but nothing happens.I'm so tired of this pain,with any luck hopefully tonight I can succeed.
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