I was thinking

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by SuicideIsTheWrongOption, Mar 13, 2010.

  1. SuicideIsTheWrongOption

    SuicideIsTheWrongOption Well-Known Member

    if the people in my life truly love me....truly. They would let me go.
    The only reason i'm still here today is because i don't want to hurt them. People who aren't like me can't understand the emotional pain i go through day in and day out. I don't know why, i never had any bad happen to me, i've had everything i've wanted or needed.

    I just want death, and i can't..because they can't understand this pain, they don't know what a relief it would be for me to die.
    Society is flawed. we don't teach people to feel, or understand, to think rationally, we teach rules and punishment.

    Hell...if they truly loved me, they'd be the one to help me end it. I guess i'm not loved.
  2. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    People dont let us go because it would mean that they gave up just like we did. And for some reason that is just so taboo.

    I dont know it just seems to me that when family and friends mourn the passing of another, it is quite selfish. They dont really feel your loss but rather the loss of you being in their lives( if that makes any sense). Not "oh he/she is going to miss so much in life." But rather "I'm going to miss him/her so much in my life." Same as letting you go. Not "oh he/she is trying so hard but still hurting so muchand nothing changes". But rather "cant let them go cuz it will hurt me or change my life too much."

    Damned if you do... damned if you dont!
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 13, 2010
  3. lightbeam

    lightbeam Antiquities Friend

    I agree with Carla. It is selfish for people to keep us around so they don't feel alone.
  4. summerschild

    summerschild Well-Known Member

    I guess a lot of people here have watched one of my favorite movies - 'Night Mother. One of my favorite parts of the movie explains in ways I could never have why I don't believe we are giving up. In the movie Sissy's character says (and I am paraphrasing somewhat) "I'm NOT giving up. This IS the other thing I'm trying! I know there are other things that might work but might work isn't good enough!"

    To me suicide is not giving up. This is the other solution. And this time it will be a permanent one because so far all the other solutions I have tried have all been "band-aid" solutions. All they do is cover up the problem but it is still there. Suicide to me is ripping off the band-aid so that the problem can heal once and for all. This solution can't fail. It will last.

    As to those left behind? To tell the truth (IMHO) they will be sad for a few days. But it will end. And for my "husband"? I have hinted that I am considering this. He thought it very very funny. He won't miss me at all.

    If I have any regrets its that it will take me so long to get what I need. If I could go tonight I would.