I wish that I was a human. That way I would comprehend what others feel. This thing called love. I've felt it once. It felt nice. If I were human, I would have a soul. I would be complete. Because I'm not, all I have is this big f*cking hole where one should be. Sorry, we ran out. You'll have to make do. On and on I go, well off course now. I have every intention of giving up yet I do not. What makes me go? That little sliver of time when I have a soul. When I'm human. When I know love Then the soul is gone, and the hole is back, bigger than before. There are people in there. People that wish to harm me. They drag me in and in an instant I'm gone. Through the portal to otherworldly pain. If I could just be happy I would. But instead there's this hole that regular people don't have. A hole that humans have long since filled. I wish I were human. That way I could feel what other people feel. I would feel loved. I would feel welcomed. I would feel complete, the hole filled. But no. Wishes are outside my abilities. Drown in a river of hate and you'll have me, choking on my own hate and deprived of all else. This has led me to believe that there is no God. Why would you make a person feel such things? Do you enjoy doing this? Like a child tearing the legs from a spider and watching it try to flee from its tormentor? Death is a gentile fellow... Overwhelming comfort resides within him. Take his hand, and you leave behind everything. In death, the hole is filled.