Don't search for happiness. You aren't ready for it. Not yet... Examine the attributes of the world you live in. Baby steps now... Find the things that you are content with. Find those things that you haven't really paid much attention. Ignore the "experience" that clouds your mind. Tabula rasa... Don't assign labels... And just accept these things as they are. Now examine the attributes of your life. Again, pinpoint the qualities that you are content with. Content, not happy... Maybe when we grow a little more... These little things that are in your life, the ones you wouldn't mind experiencing every day, These are your stepping stones. Baby steps now... As you make your way across the river, keep an eye out for your chance. You'll be travelling slowly, so a chance will surely surface eventually. If you truly started from such a low point, certainly you wouldn't scrutinize an opportunity... It's not a horse... Whether it's a carp or a koi, you have finally started. It's just up to you to continue... It will get easier as you continue. As you continue, you will grow. As you grow, your steps will become greater... And hopefully, you will soon reach your destination. Don't get lost.