because i wasn't trying to kill myself. last night after my boyfriend and i got into a big fight (it was just after midnight, so it was mother's day and i'm pregnant and it made me feel like crap) i grabbed a shaving razor and just cut deep enough to draw blood. normally after a fight i just cry hysterically for a few hours, but because i cry so often it doesn't do anything for me anymore. i had this uncontrollable urge to break something-- and since we've already gone through a new tv (bf broke it) and a new computer monitor (i broke out of retaliation) i didn't want to destroy something i'd have to replace. so this was my alternative. i am so disappointed in myself. to cut for the first time on mother's day... and to be told that i don't deserve recognition even as a mother-to-be at 31 weeks pregnant. i hate myself but i love my baby and i would never do anything to harm him.