I haven't made a post in a while. This is probably pointless because it's just me complaining and I'm not going to get anywhere by doing so but oh well. I feel alone. I won't use fancy words to show just how alone. I just feel alone. I don't feel like I belong on this planet. I never really have, but at the moment, that feeling is ten times worse. I don't feel that I can be happy hear. Maybe happy for an hour, but never truly happy. I feel so wrong realising I hardly smile, and may not smile for weeks at a time, or laugh, or just feel happy or okay. I know there's probably a million other people out there who feel that way, but what difference does that make? That just makes me feel worse. I hate the thought of others feeling shit. I have no life, and at the moment, I feel so alone that I feel that I have no friends either. I don't really have any real ones. I have a couple I guess but, none are really the kind of friendship I'd like. Thoughts from the past have recently all come back to make me feel crap all over again. Knowing I'll never talk to the person I love and I'm certain I will love forever, again. I don't think it's going to heal. I never will heal because something new will always come along, or the past just comes back. I don't have much to live for. I really just feel like dying. I'm not going to, because I never will. Well I hope I do one day, but I'm too weak to do it myself, even if it's what I truly want. I don't understand why people have to live with this? Why is there no cure to feeling horrible. I just hate life.