idk

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by Asylum Project, Nov 28, 2010.

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  1. Asylum Project

    Asylum Project Well-Known Member

    They call us the loaners, we stand alone,
    we don't know where we belong, so I sing you this song.
    we tighten the noose around our necks, and hang our heads high.
    our feet fall as we die. At least you can say we tryed...

    They call us the loaners, we walk alone,
    We come from broken pasts, the scars we wear will always last.
    hearts broken, lungs choking, we exhale...

    They call us the loaners, we die alone,
    souls flown from this life, strangers come and cut the rope.
    wheres the hope? now left with the question why?

    They call us the loaners, we are shadows past,
    We are dreamers waking life, we are faiths devestion.
    we are lifes creation, we are deaths destination...

    They call us the loaners, we are winters cold.
    we are autumns changing colors, we are spings blooming flowers.
    we are the summers heat, we are the changing seasons...

    They call us the loaners, we are the gleaming snow
    we are the falling rain, we are emotions pain.
    We are the loaners and we stand alone...
     
  2. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    I really liked this.

    Especially 'we tighten the noose around our necks, and hang our heads high'

    Needs a bit of cleaning up with spelling and grammar and a much more deserving title! :p

    Thank you for sharing.
     
  3. Asylum Project

    Asylum Project Well-Known Member

    thank you for your input yea I need to work on my grammar but thats just the rough draft.
     
  4. Asylum Project

    Asylum Project Well-Known Member

    They call us the loaners, we stand alone,
    we don't know where we belong, so I sing you this song.
    we tighten the noose around our necks, and hang our heads high.
    our feet fall as we die. At least you can say we tryed...

    They call us the loners; we walk alone,
    We come from broken pasts, the scars we wear will always last.

    hearts broken, lungs choking, we exhale...

    They call us the loners, we die alone,
    souls flown from this life, strangers come and cut the rope.
    where's the hope? now left with the question, why?

    They call us the loners, we are shadows past,
    We are dreamers waking life, we are faiths devastation.
    we are life's (pro)creation, we are death's (pre)destination...

    They call us the loners, we are winter's cold.
    we are autumn's changing colors, we are spring's blooming flowers.
    we are the summers heat, we are the changing seasons...
     
  5. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    Nice read - it's loners and not loaners though....;)
     
  6. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    Your poem has inspired me.

    They call us the loaners, yeah, we're the banks
    We foreclose on your home while we ask for your thanks
    We charge when you borrow, we charge when you pay
    We're here to report you when your check is delayed

    They call us the loaners, yeah, us mortgage crooks
    We fast-talked you into a loan 'cause we're money-grubbing schnooks!!
    Now you're in debt; now you can't pay.
    We already knew you had no dough with which to play
    So you are our doughboy. Your life is destroyed.
    Don't mention it. Our concern was only a ploy.

    :rolleyes:
     
  7. Asylum Project

    Asylum Project Well-Known Member

    lol omg haha i did not evennotice that
     
  8. Asylum Project

    Asylum Project Well-Known Member

    you made my day lol
     
  9. Asylum Project

    Asylum Project Well-Known Member

    I hope I did it right this time if you guys would correct my punctuation that would be great, or any other errors I want to photoshop it on a picture my sister loved it.


    They call us the loners, we stand alone,
    we don't know where we belong, so I sing you this song.
    we tighten the noose around our necks, and hang our heads high.
    our feet fall as we die. At least you can say we tried.

    They call us the loners, we walk alone,
    We come from broken pasts, the scars we wear will always last.

    hearts broken, lungs choking, we exhale...

    They call us the loners, we die alone,
    souls flown from this life, strangers come and cut the rope.
    where's the hope? now left with the question, why?

    They call us the loners, we are shadows past,
    We are dreamers waking life, we are faiths devastation.
    we are life's (pro)creation, we are death's (pre)destination...

    They call us the loners, we are winter's cold.
    we are autumn's changing colors, we are spring's blooming flowers.
    we are the summers heat, we are the changing seasons...
     
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