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If i die, all of this will go away. It will finally be over...

#1
I will no longer have to look in the mirror and see my ugly self
I will no longer feel like a failure
I will no longer try and figure why my brother and father no longer speak to me
I will no longer miss my 2 dogs
I will no longer cry over Rachel
I will no longer about being practically disabled and uemployed
I will no longer have to worry about homelessness
I will no longer be stuck in my room with no friends to hang out
I will no longer think i have nothing to look forward to
I will see my close friend and grandparents and aunty in heaven (or not)
I will no longer suffer unbearable panic attacks wherever i leave home
All the feeling of anger, sadness, fear, jealousy, resentment, hopelessness will disappear

Suffer all of these problems for another 50 years, or be at peace

Man i feel like such a loser begging for sympathy writing that, because many others have it worse

Anyway none of this matters, i will certainly die soon

Love you guys. You guys understand and tried your best to help me. This is not a note. I will definitely be alive for a while still
 
#4
I will no longer have to look in the mirror and see my ugly self
I will no longer feel like a failure
I will no longer try and figure why my brother and father no longer speak to me
I will no longer miss my 2 dogs
I will no longer cry over Rachel
I will no longer about being practically disabled and uemployed
I will no longer have to worry about homelessness
I will no longer be stuck in my room with no friends to hang out
I will no longer think i have nothing to look forward to
I will see my close friend and grandparents and aunty in heaven (or not)
I will no longer suffer unbearable panic attacks wherever i leave home
All the feeling of anger, sadness, fear, jealousy, resentment, hopelessness will disappear

Suffer all of these problems for another 50 years, or be at peace

Man i feel like such a loser begging for sympathy writing that, because many others have it worse

Anyway none of this matters, i will certainly die soon

Love you guys. You guys understand and tried your best to help me. This is not a note. I will definitely be alive for a while still
How about changing all the I will no longer to I will help others to get through all the I will nots? All those things above are painful issues and I get that bit the reality is no your right you won’t feel any of it because you won’t feel anything . You will have gone and left us all with the same concerns and fears with no hope : what if we all who feel like you check out. What have we learnt what have we changed nothing !!! What a waste .... please understand that everything you have said is your reality I get that . But you can change that menu right? You can heal and you can not be that person xxxxx life was a gift to you please make it count . Make your journey count .. be the one who shows others the answer to all the above . Don’t give up , don’t let life drag you to this.
 
#5
I no longer have to look in the mirror and see my ugly self = I will continue to look at myself and love who I am and what I stand for?
I will no longer feel like a failure. I who’s opinion no one that matters so fuxk em?
I will no longer try and figure why my brother and father no longer speak to me? There loss!
I will no longer miss my 2 dogs yes you will and they I’ll miss you..
I will no longer cry over Rachel. No but then you can do that alive .
I will no longer about being practically disabled and uemployed. But there are routes to not being in this situation and I will help you !
I will no longer have to worry about homelessness. There are options
I will no longer be stuck in my room with no friends to hang out . But at least you be in a room not homeless.
I will no longer think i have nothing to look forward to. Find something to look forward to
I will see my close friend and grandparents and aunty in heaven (or not) but they not ready to see you
I will no longer suffer unbearable panic attacks wherever i leave home. But this can be changed
All the feeling of anger, sadness, fear, jealousy, resentment, hopelessness will disappear turn this into a resilience and power

Suffer all of these problems for another 50 years, or be at peace. Yes for another 50 precious years because it won’t last this long . I promise

Man i feel like such a loser begging for sympathy writing that, because many others have it worse your not a loser your just human with feelings and needs xxxxx

Anyway none of this matters, i will certainly die soon

Love you guys. You guys understand and tried your best to help me. This is not a note. I will definitely be alive for a while still[/QUOTE]
I will no longer have to look in the mirror and see my ugly self
I will no longer feel like a failure
I will no longer try and figure why my brother and father no longer speak to me
I will no longer miss my 2 dogs
I will no longer cry over Rachel
I will no longer about being practically disabled and uemployed
I will no longer have to worry about homelessness
I will no longer be stuck in my room with no friends to hang out
I will no longer think i have nothing to look forward to
I will see my close friend and grandparents and aunty in heaven (or not)
I will no longer suffer unbearable panic attacks wherever i leave home
All the feeling of anger, sadness, fear, jealousy, resentment, hopelessness will disappear

Suffer all of these problems for another 50 years, or be at peace
 

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