if i wanna die tonight..

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by jane doe, Dec 25, 2006.

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  1. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    why wouldn´t i bleed until death, i just don´t want this anymore, i don´t want to be happy, i wanna cry and bleed until nobidy can remember me anymore. i´m just here because my bf made me come, because he says it make me feel better. and the trouth is, it does, but i don´t want it.
    i don´t want to wake up it the morning because i don´t want to go to sleep , i want to die now
     
  2. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    What's wrong jane darling?Is something making you feel like this?I know at times it's hard to pinpoint one exact thing,but is there one or more thing's that you think could be making you feel so low?
     
  3. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    no reason,as always, i just don´t want the good things that can come., i odn´t want o live anymore, the onlything that makes me not kill myself is my bf, but now i don´t know what is stronger
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 25, 2006
  4. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    just as i tought no one care if i die tonight..tanks you ace
     
  5. Jimmy_Boeboe!

    Jimmy_Boeboe! Well-Known Member

    I care Jane. But what can I say? I don't want to be happy either, I want the same as you. I don't have a whole talk or pep talk for you. I am lost myself. All I can give you is a part of my little flame of hope. It is still burning. It can burn for you too. I am silently and in all innocentness hoping that it will burn forever and become bigger. I hope it will for you too. Don't let your flame go out.
     
  6. TLA

    TLA Antiquitie's Friend

    I care. Don't bleed. Hold on.

    Even though you say your bf is not a lot, he really is. It could mean a reason for you to wake up. When he gets home, it might be great. At least you have someone that loves you. I think that is one wonderful reason not to die.
     
  7. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    i know is wonderfull, but i don´t want wonderfull things, i told him i don´t want ot be with him anymore because i just want to hurt myself and die, and he smiled and told me he would never go away, he doesn´t understand me, i want to die, i don´t want happy times anymore, tonight i don´t need to cut to feel well again, tonight i want to die
     
  8. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    jane why do you want to die and not be happy?do you feel you don't deserve to be?it has to be something,just has to be I know it.Please tell me,do you think something has happened to cause this for you or it's just a feeling of being depressed?I know at times I can't even pinpoint exactly why I'm down I just get down because of the Depression.
     
  9. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    i think is for depresion, but what the hell. i don´t care why, i´m here because i´m forced to try to feel better
     
  10. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    I think it's for the depression of course,I'm so sorry you're feeling this way I'm here if you want to talk I really do care about you.
     
  11. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    but what should i do? i have this feeling inside, i feel i´m gona blow out.and the wors is that i haven´t a moment to kill myself tonight, because i´m in my home and my family is here.
     
  12. ace

    ace Well-Known Member


    Jane relax and try and take it easy and promise me you won't do anything silly?Don't worry about a thing or try your best to and attempt to take it easy.
     
  13. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    i´m dessesperate, crying, and i just needed to hear that someone cares about me. and now you are here, that seems not to be enough, i´m sorry ´, bothering you ace.
     
  14. blackfire

    blackfire Well-Known Member

    jane I feel the same way. I want to die more than anything else right now. As I am sitting here I remembered I have a counseling appointment Wednsday. i really don't give a crap if I go. Your bf just wants the best for you, but I know he doesn't understand you. It is hard for someone to know how to feel if they don't know what depression feels like. I am sorry you feel so bad right now. just PM. Take care.
     
  15. ace

    ace Well-Known Member


    You aren't bothering me and this will pass this horrible feeling,let me re-assure you of that I'm not just saying that.Not so long ago I was in such a hole and wanting to escape so badly,I don't count myself as out of the wood's by all mean's but I'm trying.Jane you can do this I care so much for you and I hope I can help you.
     
  16. bipolarkitty

    bipolarkitty Well-Known Member

    jane, I'm so sorry that you're hurting so much. Please lean on us, we're all here for you. I understand not wanting good things to happen to you. When I think that way, it's my way of making it easier to die. I've recently been having a lot of thoughts about wanting bad things to happen to me. I think it's because I feel like I deserve it. You're not alone. It helps to talk to people that understand. Your boyfriend sounds like he cares a great deal for you. Grab onto that and hold on. These feelings will pass. And while you're waiting, you can come here and talk. I'm here for you.
     
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