If I'm a bad person, there's no reason for me to live

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by One Great Name, Apr 19, 2016.

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  1. Really, I don't want to die, there would be a lot for me to look forward to if I didn't, but I've sinned so much and I still make the same mistakes. I feel morally stuck and because I haven't confessed, I haven't gotten help to fix things and I haven't been forgiven by God. If God would judge me as a bad person, I have no reason to live. I haven't confessed because I can't be sure people would help me or condemn me. They don't understand where I've been or how much I really hate it, so it would be very easy for them to call me a monster and stay far away. Maybe I'm making a big deal out of problems far smaller than the ones everyone else on this website has. I can't be sure I have any legitimate psychological problems many others face and if I just got help improving my behavior and I knew God had forgiven me I would be just fine. Tomorrow I will have a good chance to talk things out with my uncle, should I take it? Gosh, it's pitiful writing the same issues out again.
     
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  2. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support Forum Pro SF Supporter

    Hey there one great name, I don't know what kind of sin you're talking about. But let me ask you this. If you had a son or a daughter and they did this "sin" you're referring to, would you forgive them? Maybe God has more "grace" than you realize. You might want to forgive yourself too for being human. Take care my friend.
    Brian
     
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  3. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    I know this feeling well and I've asked myself the same question Brian77 has just said "let me ask you this. If you had a son or a daughter and they did this "sin" you're referring to, would you forgive them?"
    I know I would forgive whatever it was for another person, but it can be very hard to forgive oneself.
    If you want to talk privately, drop me a pm.
     
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  4. Thauoy

    Thauoy Well-Known Member

    God will forgive any kind of sins if you repent with a pure and sincere heart. But He might not forgive those who kill themselves and waste this precious gift of life.
    As far as God is concerned , everybody is sinful in one way or the other. So, you are not alone. If you have no reason to live, Live for the sake of God to help other people or the people in SF. Atleast you can console them and give valuable advice. Many people especially in SF are so lonely that they are eager to have someone to talk and share.

    Thanks and best wishes.
     
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  5. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    I'm sorry to hear you feel this low about yourself.

    I don't know what you've done... and what your specific faith is... but the God I used to believe in forgave, as long as you asked forgiveness and realized your 'sins'.
    Further more, maybe you would feel better if you made up for them somehow? Could you volunteer for charity, would that make you feel better?

    But I really urge you to talk to someone, maybe a counselor or a therapist who can help you work through these things? Those people will not judge you, but will help you to handle things a lot better.
     
  6. bobbob

    bobbob Well-Known Member

    Hi
    I think @Brian777 might have nailed it. Dont be harder on yourself than you would be on others. Forgive yourself what you would forgive others for. If its something you can make some ammends for, then take time to do that.
    Take care
     
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  7. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Did you decide to talk things over with your uncle? Try not to compare your issues to others issues, no two people's pain are the same, that is a fact! Do you feel your feelings are validated? Keep us updated. We care!
     
  8. Maybe it would be best if I tried to get over it as best as I could by ignoring it. At least for now, anyway, when it seems everyone would be watching if I let it all out. The religious connection to God hasn't caused this to trouble me, I believe in the gospel and its validity in being the best way to live. I'd guess I would believe in most of the same morals if I wasn't raised in church. I understand the reasoning behind being told to confess sins, but it's certainly not for destroying any amount of a good reputation I may have, as it would now. The subject of my mistakes will undoubtedly continue to bother me until I reach out to someone, maybe to a certain extent afterwards as well, but allowing the worry to lock up everything else in my life when confessing now would do more harm than good anyway is worthless. I think I'll put the issue on hold until later. If it matters to anyone what my religion is, I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. To Inspire&Inquire, I don't mean to be rude, but why would you "stand up to God" or "declare your independence" when He is perfect, His plan for our lives is perfect and He intends to help us perfect ourselves? God wants to guide us on the safest paths available. God doesn't fall short, we do in our actions and thoughts. sometimes we convince ourselves
     
  9. Dang, accidentally posted when I wasn't ready. Sometimes we convince ourselves the problems we've caused are His fault and other times the challenges we face are meant to make us stronger. We couldn't know happiness or righteousness if we did not know what was wrong. Separating yourself from God, who intends to help you progress, wouldn't be bravery, but folly, leaving you flawed and incomplete. Again, I don't mean to offend you. I'm making my perspective clear as I can with my unimpressive writing skills.
     
  10. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    Nothing rude or offensive there - your faith is your business entirely and if you don't wish to step away from your belief system then of course that is absolutely reasonable. I don't have an "official" faith but I do know a lot of Christians and I do know that the core premise is that God KNOWS that humans are not perfect and it is impossible for a person to live without sin. If your religion requires confession to be forgiven, then I think that you need to do that. My understanding is that God doesn't 'not forgive' people as long as they are truly sorry for the 'bad things' they have done.

    I agree with Brian that you need to forgive yourself as well - nobody is perfect - everyone has weaknesses. Doing a bad thing doesn't make a person fundamentally bad. Maybe it makes you weak, but turning away from your belief system isn't going to make you stronger in this instance. I do understand shame and feeling that you are not worthy - but re-read what you have written about God and write down what you know about His position on forgiveness. You know that hiding away is not the right answer for you.
     
  11. You're right, I should try and confess. I have to do it to make things right in my head. Decisions that don't align with what I feel God is telling me always leave me unhappy. I've come to the conclusion, along with it being best to follow my beliefs, if I choose to ignore a moral problem, I end up ignoring anything I've connected emotionally with the problem as well, including spirituality which has become fundamental to my character. The beliefs I did block off for the past day were ones that have become central to my ability to be happy and also took deep roots in my life's goals, so the apathy was actually worse than the bad feelings I've described so far. It was surprising and frightening, I was able to block parts of myself from my view well enough for me to almost forget they were there. I felt purposeless and lost. Thank you for helping me get that in order again.
     
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