If Im not going to kill myself, then I might get killed

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Rolo555, Dec 26, 2008.

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  1. Rolo555

    Rolo555 Well-Known Member

    Christmas Eve, Im driving and I am about to make a left hand turn when all of a sudden this car behind drives over to the left hand side of me when im about to make a left hand. I saw the car before I made the turn. But I wish I never did see it.

    And I go over my parents house on Christmas and they still treat me like a goddamn kid. And I 26 nearly reaching 27.

    Yeah almost 27 live alone, got hardly any friends, no damn girl, a job which cut my hours. Meanwhile I see plenty of people around me my age atleast have a relationship, maybe a kid or two and some friends.

    Yeah great life ............... wake up, work, come home, maybe play video games, internet, sleep ..........repeat.

    I know by now I will never get into relationships at this point since I never had one. And parents know this since they NEVER asked me about any girls.

    Please everyone here hope my life turns around in the next few weeks. I dont know how much longer I can stay in this life. I waited too damn long and I sense the end is near for me. If God exists, then God has screwed me long enough.

    Lets see what comes first ............... me killing myself or me getting killed.

    And I wish I did get hit and killed.
  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I am glad you saw the car. Something in you must be as well because you averted the accident. Just because you have yet to have a relationship does not mean there never will be one. Have you explained to your parents how you feel about the way they treat you? If not, that may be a good place to startwith being proactive about your situation.
  3. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Hi Rolo. I'm in a very similar situation as you. I'll be turning 28 next year and I've never really had a girlfriend either. I don't let it get me down though. Don't feel like you need to keep up with other people. When the time is right, you'll meet the right woman and get married. That's what I believe. No point in rushing things and ending up with the wrong person. :hug:
  4. Mightbehere

    Mightbehere Well-Known Member

    That's very true, some people just enjoy their own company as well, nothing wrong with that. Also looking at some types of relationships its certainly better by ones own. Instead of beating yourself up for being alone why not sit back and enjoy the benefits and freedom.
  5. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Rolo,
    Don't rush into a relationship. Take your time to find the right person. I have had plenty of relationships and it always turned out the same way. I would choose the wrong person.
    My therapist told me I would choose the wrong women because I always met them in bars. She said it was the excitement of finding partiers. I now live at my sisters and refuse to get into another relationship. I am 51 soon to be 52. I just figure I am to old to play those games anymore.
    My point is don't just settle for the wrong person just because you are lonely. Maybe join a club or something where you meet ppl who are like you. Or attend support groups, go to church( that sounds odd coming from me because I have my own beleifs about religion). There are options out there you just need to seek them out. I wish you luck and if you need to talk feel free to PM me.~Joseph~
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi Rolo,

    I'm also glad you saw the car of course :hug: Idk what advice to give you, but I hope you feel better after coming back from Las vegas :hug:
  7. levitated-one

    levitated-one Well-Known Member

    Wise words Dave
  8. lonelymortal

    lonelymortal Well-Known Member

    I feel like the threadstarter too. I've had too many close calls already. Almost got hit by 3 cars, overdosed on pills once and had a seizure ?, had serious food poisoning once, almost been in a few car crashes. I'd much rather end it myself in the way I like then let some idiot take care of the job for me.
  9. DrowningInTears

    DrowningInTears Well-Known Member

    I feel the same way, I'm completely useless and never respected.
  10. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    When you start feeling better about yourself, then others will start respecting you. :rolleyes:
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