If only it were that simple...

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by ALoveLetterAway, Mar 20, 2011.

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  1. ALoveLetterAway

    ALoveLetterAway Active Member

    I love my friends. They're really supportive and when they learned about my anorexia, they offered any help they could give me. Sure, they're not professionals, doctors, etc., but sometimes all you need is someone to vent to.

    What's the problem, then? They think me getting better is just as simple and clicking my heels together and saying "There's no place like home" a few times. As far as they're concerned, I shouldn't be struggling at all, they talk about how if they were in my shoes, they wouldn't need any help and would be fine in no time.

    No. Just no. I wish they'd get it, I wish I could tell them why they're wrong without being inturrupted by one if them telling me to eat something, and the other asking how much I weigh every five minutes.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    If they have never been where you are they will never understand hun. It is good you are here because people here understand it is not as easy as that.
    It will take therapy to help you change i hope you get someone kind who can listen and understand fully what is going on within your mind hugs
  3. ALoveLetterAway

    ALoveLetterAway Active Member

    Exactly. When people act like they know more than I do without going through it, it gets on my nerves :/

    Thanks:) Hopefully I'll find someone. -hugs-
  4. Odyssey

    Odyssey Member

    My best friend struggles with anorexia, and I must admit to having a problem with not remembering---or not caring---or not desiring---to eat, though I'm not obsessive about my weight. We've found that eating habits is one of the ways we can support each other. We both know we can't just "get over it", but gentle support has been very beneficial to both of us. We don't talk about weight, and only rarely do we actually come out and encourage the other to eat in so many words. More often it's things like talking about foods we really enjoy, talking about a meal in progress, or making a point of mentioning when we're going to get a snack (when we're on the phone or chatting online). Rather than being in each other's faces about it (no matter how well-meaning it may be), we just try to gently remind each other of eating, which helps both of us remember that we're trying to be better about what we eat, how much, and how often, to try to maintain a more healthy pattern. And it isn't like this is the central focus of our conversations, so when we do it, it doesn't feel overbearing. I don't know if this would be something that would work for everyone, but it's a dynamic that has helped---and continues to help---both of us. Perhaps it's an idea that could be beneficial to you, as well.
  5. ALoveLetterAway

    ALoveLetterAway Active Member

    That sounds like a great idea, actually! I wish my friends could do that. I have one friend who's less "in-your-face" about it, but most of them take the "Throw a Twinkie at her and refuse to let her go to the gym" as well as the "Talk about it very loudly in front of everyone" approach.

    I'll definitly talk to them, though. Sounds like it would work better than what they're doing now.
  6. Kathy

    Kathy Well-Known Member

    I remember a few years ago thinking "Why do people with eating disorders not eat? If I ever got like that i'd just eat". I can't beleive how naive and stupid I was back then. I've suffered with eating problems. I know what it's like now, but it's something you will never understand if you've not been through it, no matter how hard they try. Unfortunatly it's just one of those things we have to accept.
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