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if something doesn't change

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i've basically been a victim of child abuse from my mother.
i'm a 15 year old male and i cry every night. i've run away [in fear from my mother] a total count of 5 times. i have no one to turn to, so i decided to try this out. my reasoning of suicide [ if ever attempted ] would be to sacrifice my life to show my mother what she's done. you might see this is "too far", but its not. its the only reasoning. i need something to change. if there is a god, i wish for him to change things, and i wish for him to save me. i hope someone here can help me. i would enjoy some kind of friend for once.
clee19@gmail.com is the email address
charulllz is my AIM.
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Hey im Laura.

Its horrible what you are going through right now but it can be changed. Please dont use sucide to try and get back at your mother. I know you mguht want to hurt her but using this - you never know how bad it will affect another person. What she has done to you is wrong and may be unforgiving. You are only 15, you have such a life ahead of you dont give up because of one person. Im glad you came to post on hre first before taking your life. Do you have a myspace or msn? I have both which can both be found on my profile. Add me we can talk anytime. Even if im not online you can still email me. I will reply.

Could you go to the police about your mother? They take this very seriously and will be on YOUR side. Your a victim. There are a lot of charities such as Child Line who deal with this. You need to stay positive. Yes you might need to take the first step to deal with these issues but i promise you once you do it will get so mcuh better. What do you want to aim for in life? What do you want to achieve? Keep it in mind and aim for it. You ahve a lot to live for even if you dont see it at this time. Nothing lasts forever. Please reconsider for a few more days.
You are brave for posting this so lets get something done about it now. Good luck if i dont hear from you and take care.
you can pm me any time and speak to me im here to help. you should think about telling the authorities about whats going on and also id like to ask what country are you from?

charlotte xxxx
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