If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the soul

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by PostBlue, Nov 27, 2008.

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  1. PostBlue

    PostBlue Member

    I was out with some guys who i thought were my friends. I was playing a drinking game that i had know idea how to play so by the end of the game i was wasted. The two guys led me into a room and tried to convince me to have sex with them (NO), a blow job (NO), a hand job (NO), a quick tit flash (NO). Evertime they asked me to do something i said no, but these guys were my friends i shouldn't have even had to say no. They started saying all these disgusting things to me like i was a slut. I was supposed to spend they night but after they starting saying all those things to me i didn't think it was safe for me to fall asleep, so i snuck out when they weren't looking.

    I know this may not sound like a big deal, but to me it was. It hurt to trust people and think that they're your friends and have them treat you like a piece of trash and an easy lay. I realized that they didn't really care about me, they just wanted to use me. This wasn't the reason i tried to kill myself but it was the straw the broke the camels back

    After i snuck out, i went home and started crying. I hated myself, i couldn't believe that they had tricked me ino thinking that they were my friends. I went to the bathroom and saw the sleeping pills i have to take everyday for my insomnia. I have already planed that i was going to kill myself, it was just the when that i haven't figured out. I thought that that time was the perfect moment because i found that every aspect of the life was shit, besides no one would miss me, i had a twin sister (issuses from that) thats better than me al everything, my parents hated me because i can't be the daughter that they invisioned (issuses). I thought that they would be relieved cuz i was the expensive daughter (I had spent my summer in the hospital from almost dying from anorexia and see countless therapists). I was already drunk, so my death would be easy and i took them and waited to die. Before the sleeping pills killed me, all the alcohol i drank made me throw up everything in my stomach, including the pills.

    It seems weird to just end the story at that but right now i'm giving life another shot.
     
  2. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    When friends treat you like that you are better off without them. I'm not suprised you were upset. Glad you'd drunk enough to make you throw the pills up and that you are strong enough to give life another go. There are some really good people out there who will treat you so much better. Hope you can find some of them. Best wishes.
     
  3. Mightbehere

    Mightbehere Well-Known Member

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    I doubt the sleeping pills will kill you, probably just make you sick. Maybe try making friends with some girls instead of guys who want to get you drunk.
     
  4. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    Hi postblue. Sorry to hear that your friends treated you so badly. Friends don't get their friend drunk and try to force them into having sex. They sound like assholes. I'm glad that you're still here and willing to give life another shot. Maybe make some new friends? :hug:
     
  5. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    I am sorry to hear you were treated tha way by people you thought were your friends. I am glad you had the sense to get away from the situation. I am thankful you ended up getting sick so the pills did not have a chance to cause any major damage. Good luck with starting over. You will make it. :hug:
     
  6. alle_vite

    alle_vite Well-Known Member

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    Hi hunni sorry to hear you cam across them low lifes and sorry to hear how the treat you, and even more sorry that they made things get to the point were you tried to od, but when you were sick that is lifes way of telling you it isnt your time to go yet, and i am very happy and proud that you are making another go of things,i look forward to hearing of you progress.

    Keep your chin up hunni


    **************HUGZ***********
     
  7. Rangoon

    Rangoon Active Member

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    Pardon my French but they were not men they were wankers, plain and simple! It's so scary as a father to think what kind of dangers you women have to be careful of. I hope Karma pays them a visit. Lucky you threw up.

    Don't let the bastards get you down.
     
  8. Oak

    Oak Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    Hun you are lucky to have had the strenght to run out of that place in time. If you had stayed even few minutes more you would have something harsh to deal with today. On the other hand the alcool saved you life and you are willing and ready to give it a second shot. Go at it dear. It is well worth trying. I wish you well and wish you to meet real good people out there coz good ones do exist. Just have to be a little more cautious.

    All the best
    good luck dear

    granny xx
     
  9. d-pressed

    d-pressed Well-Known Member

    Re: If the tell u she dies of sleeping pills, she actually died of a bleeding of the

    Hello

    I think you first need to realise that these animals were never your friends, so there is simply no loss there. In fact, even though it sounds probably strange, you looked after yourself by leaving the situation and weren't frightened to say no. Thankfully you are in the know now rather than later, when, as other people who have posted here have said; the situation could have developed into something a lot worse.

    Of course you say this is not the only reason why you took the overdose - you've had a hell of a lot to deal with the past couple of months especially with your being admitted to hospital. I hope you are being treated properly for your anorexia. Are you on anti-depressant medication and taking supplements as well? I have been on numerous medications - my insomnia medication I was on for around 2 months, when actually it says you're only supposed to take it for 2 weeks. One side effect I had was hallucinations. I'd suggest keeping a diary so you can notice better where there is an unexplainable shift in your mood, etc, as it can be down to medication. Thankfully most insomnia medications are not known to cause death upon overdose - but have you been checked out (blood tests) since your overdose?

    You mention that you feel like a burden on your parents because you didn't live up to their expectations and was the 'expensive child.' I can relate to this entirely (I was institutionalised as well, though not for an eating disorder). What do you think your parents expect of you, really? Do your parents really think of your health in terms of a price?

    Right, I'll shut up now, but hang in there. Feel free to message me.
     
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