could you live the rest of your life feeling this way? Or do you a have timeframe or a certain circumstance that has to be met before you'd be willing to check out? I've been pondering this alot lately. Sometimes I think I could live out my days this way, but under different conditions; I wouldn't be able to deal with worrying about life's everyday stressors; like working & making ends meet, or trying to keep relationships together. I would just want to be left alone. But that's not going to happen, so... The main thing that stops me from even considering doing anything to myself right now is my boyfriend. I couldn't put him through that. We almost broke up a couple months back & I got scared, there would be nothing left holding me to this world. I have a method & plan already decided for when the time does comes. I guess luckly for me the method I have chosen isn't easy to come by, so that keeps me from doing anything impulsive. But it's also a pretty guaranteed method, so once I do secure what I need, there's really no turning back. I find it hard wrapping my head around living like this for another 50, 60 or70 years. How could I? How could anyone? Popping pills just to make it through the day. Well I guess that's how the elderly live anyway. We've found all these ways to extend life, but have we actually improved the quality of life? Maybe if my good days began to out number my bad I could gain some perspective, but I haven't had a good day in... I don't even know. I'm going off subject. I'll end here.