I really don't know how to feel right now. Empathy and compassion are two little somethings I am not used to in any relationship, let alone those of the romantic variety. but this girl just... brings it out of me. I love it and hate it. The love I feel, it's real, tangible, but the pain and my insecurities are very real as well. I just, I usually love myself but she just gives me a visual and physical definition of what is is to be flawless and I can't help but feel undeserving of her attention. She should just try and spark a relationship with her friend. At least she doesn't live 2 hours away and can only see her once a month if she is lucky. They would be cute together anyways. If I really loved her, I would want her to be free to choose whomever from wherever but the duality of it all hits me in the face... If I loved myself, I would try to convince her to be mine, I know we would be happy as one... We practically already are one... I should just sleep these insecurities away for now.