if your child does it

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by jane doe, Feb 5, 2007.

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  1. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    Finding out that your child has been self-injuring might come as a total shock, and can be devastating. A person who self-injures often thinks that by taking out their emotional pain on themselves that they won’t be hurting other people. Of course their self-injury will hurt those who care about them, but you must remember that this was not their initial intention.

    Depending on the age of your child it can be hard not to panic, but you must try not to. Be there if your child wants to talk, and do not belittle them when they do. Remember that self-injury is habit-forming, and once someone is in the cycle of self-injury the smallest things might trigger them. Telling your child that it is stupid to hurt themselves because they have had an argument with a friend or because they have failed a test is not going to achieve anything, and will only upset you both.

    Although it is difficult you must try to give your child space and privacy. Encourage them to talk, and to accept professional help, but don’t force them. Obviously you want your child to stop hurting themselves, but this can be a long process. No one (especially young people) likes being told what to do and what not to do, so telling someone to stop is not helpful. Remember to let your child know that while you do not condone their behaviour, you love them unconditionally and will always support them
  2. Allo..

    Allo.. Well-Known Member

    What do you think you should do if you're the child.. should you tell your parents? What do you do if they find out?
  3. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    well, i´m the child, and i think that if they find it out i will feel worse because i´ll think i´ve dissapointed them and i´ll feel persecute all the time. I´m really carefull about it and i dn´t let any signs of it, i use bujoutery on my left arm, and so many that it´s full so my scars can´t be seen. are you the parent o the child?
  4. immure

    immure Account Closed

    well then u would have a time of hatin me for i m the parent and my approuch would be feirce and direct. i would have no tolerance. there is a reason we r adults and there for i would do as i am accounted to do. my boy started with beatin his head on the wall i stopped this quick. believe me it was a stand off litterly and i was willing to hold ground days if i had to but did not he is a boy he wanted his heart and soul to be cradled so after the anittial freak out we layed and talked and till the next time i told him i can only do wjhat is in my heart to do it is not my responsibility to serve just his ideas of what that is. there where next times but we have a good path way we r beatin back tio joy together. there r other coping skills.he said nowin on something helps a bit i think i will get a bunchin bag for anger is ok
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 6, 2007
  5. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    i don´t think any child would hate his/her parent for being so frontal. but that depend of the child personality and parents know how to fce theirr children i think
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