I'm having suicidal thoughts right now. I made a thread on here and didn't get any responses, good thing that the thread got deleted. Than to top if off I got ignored by my family tonight and that just topped the cake. My mother talked right over me and yet again I feel like I don't matter to my family. Now I'm thinking I'm being ignored on here as well, I feel like pushing everyone away right now. I'm triggered by being ignored and now I have so many negative and angry thoughts going on through my head. I love who I am as a person and I won't change for anyone....but due to this trigger I'm very depressed, angry and thinking that dying is the way to go right now. Anytime I'm ignored by anyone, it brings back so many horrible memories of when I used to be ignored. Right now I feel like doing something destructive or hurting myself in some way, and I'm fighting with myself so much right now.... and death keeps racing through my mind.