Last night i had a few great conversations... but too many not so great ones... i feel like such a problem, but people are too busy trying to save my feelings to just spit out the truth... i guess one did last night, was it right do respond how i did? im so tired of this... i just want to be able to disappear. Some people hate me but as least they spit it out... the ones who just try to slowly push away, till you no longer talk.... thats where it hurts... you have to look back and go... what did i do... could i have done more... am i that bad of a person... to which the last one, the answer is always yes. so to those of you who want me gone, just tell me, and here is my promise: I write to you, I try to talk, I have such a hard time, but I try so much. You seem bored with me, only faint replies are given I feel like I’m forcing each word, why do you feel such? what do I do wrong? how come I'm not better? I dont understand anymore I just want to give up. I would try to talk, people make it seem like such a chore though, I just dont understand. why is it so tough? I'll leave you be, I'll go away, I promise, I'm gone now. I'll live on, or I'll die soon, it doesn’t matter anymore, not when, nor how.