Im 17 with illness and I want to pass away

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by JordyNoseworthy, Feb 17, 2011.

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  1. Ive been dealing with depression for about 5 years now and have been diagnosed with chrons disease it has been about 2 years. I constantly feel like im useless and that i want to be dead insted of having to live 40 more years of this. All I feel is pain and if i dont take pills then i crash, and I hate depending on pills. Its like I have 2 monsters constantly following me and tearing me apart piece by piece. Im just waiting till i move out of my parents house so that I can hang myself or buy an anestetic that I am allergic to so that It will be quick and painless. I take pills, Ive seen therapist and im done yoga but I cannot find a way to be happy. I just keep falling back to the same spot. This is sort of my last attempt to bother trying to figure something out until I carry through with my idea when the time comes. Im not normal and I hate it.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You are still young there is new improvements in medicine everyday who knows what the future will bring to help your situation. You are not alone in having a chronic illness so many have but they gain coping skills to help them through the rough days. You have so much time in your favor for new breakthroughs and for better meds to help you both physically and mentally. Noone can see what is in the future so don't give up yet
     
  3. Thank you, For some reason that actually gave me a shred of hope o_O
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hope you do have some therapy to help you deal with your illness it helps to have someone to talk to I know it seems so hard at times but don't give up okay take each day as it comes with newer meds i hope in time this disease can be kept under control with less pain if you ever want totalk just pm me okay hugs
     
  5. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    have you thought of joining a support group near you for crohns?
    might help to talk to others with the same illness...
    totaleclipse is right ..they are finding new treatments all the time....
    I hope you can find some relief..
     
  6. peacelovingguy

    peacelovingguy Well-Known Member

    I hope you can get a bit more support - as stated, maybe a Crohn's group in the area or maybe a forum somewhere also.

    Either way, its good your here as depression is 'extra added value' with a lot of conditions. I mean to say it is part of the 'deal' sometimes. However, that's not to say you'll be feeling down all the time and when we do feel 'OK' then we can start ticking off various problems we have or adding various aims and goals.

    As stated already, the likelihood is that there will be great improvements in treating the condition - if not a cure. As far as I know this condition was only named in recent times (70s, 80s) so the research will be picking up pace.

    It was not long back when cancer was basically the final nail in the coffin. Not only that but the pain management was awful. Now, it's improved a thousand fold and that's just in a few years.

    Anyhow, are you still in education I wonder? It might be a good thing to get your mind more active and thinking about other things. I know its hard - but maybe some medication or counselling might help you in your coping skills.

    Keep talking to people also - even if its posting here at least you'll get a reply and good advice which is practical. I'm sure also self help groups for Crohn's exist and you can maybe meet other kids or young people of your age. I think it would make you feel a lot better talking to people who have this condition as well as talking about depression.

    Aged 17 you are still young and you could do with a little help in coping.

    Try not to think the world is against you or that life cannot get better. Your condition could ease a little - maybe the depression easing would help the Crohn's. People with far worse medical conditions that you get married, have jobs, do 'normal' stuff such as maybe seeing or watching sport. You could meet a nice girl and a lot of your worries might well be put into perspective.

    On the other hand a meteorite might land on your head as you pop into the garden or something.

    But, if you hang around, who knows, maybe you'll champion the cause for other younger kids who are going through what you have been through. Sounds like more should ne done for you - so if you persist and get some joy (and those who persist WILL) then you lead the way for others.

    Good luck and hope you feel a bit better in your mind and more inclined to stay alive and fight whatever battles have to be fought and enjoy the good times that are bound to come at some point for you.

    Regards from England.
     
  7. Thank you guys! Thank you so much. I honestly did not think this would be useful but just the fact that even complete strangers care wrams my heart. Everything you guys have said has helped. Thank you for being so kind
     
  8. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    :hugtackles:
     
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