I'm a pussy, and I need your sympathy

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by zeppelinrule, Mar 25, 2008.

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  1. zeppelinrule

    zeppelinrule Member

    I don't think i've ever been as sad as I was earlier tonight. I always give the impression i'm doing great, love having a laugh and pissing about at work (Fucking HAAAAAATE that job). One girl has been giving me shit, and I had these thoughts of going up to her and slitting my wrists right there. I'm 20, and I act like i'm fucking 15. I HATE my fucking job. I'd like to add that i'd never go through with that, but if i'm having these thoughts and it gives me some kind of relief, I think I should seek psychiatricn help.

    I'm a good guy, man. I'm a nice fucking guy, I don't deserve this shit. But i'm bringing it all on myself. Should I quit my job? Should I just buy some shit and freeload and stowaway? It sounds so good. I feel stuck. I am lonely, and can't get a hug from anyone. Should I talk to a counsellor?
     
  2. zeppelinrule

    zeppelinrule Member

    I'd like to add at this point that i'm convinced i'm too scared to do anything, and so wouldn't say i'm suicidal. I'd love someone to tell me i'm wrong so I can tell the doctor "Hey man, guess what? I wanna kill myself"
     
  3. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    being scared is good, it'll keep you alive. still, you don't have to feel so frustrated and lonely. that's where seeing a counsellor might help. counselling isn't for everyone... have you ever been to a therapist before? it's hard to find one that clicks with you, first off, and if you do find a good one then that's when the hard work begins! i'd say it's worth it, though, what do you think?

    catherine
     
  4. zeppelinrule

    zeppelinrule Member

    Yeah, I totally absolutely would talk to anyone semi-qualified about the way I feel. Even someone who was fucking studying therapy. I'd probably split a bottle of wine with a hobo to get this shit off my chest.

    My mum and dad have been through enough. Even though I don't support everything they've ever done, they've provided for me and loved me, and they don't deserve losing me. Tomorrow i'm going to call the doctor. I'm going to be 100% honest. How soon can I talk to someone?
     
  5. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    that's great that you are ready to talk to your doctor. who knows what the waiting lists are like where you are? i talked to my doc on a wednesday night and by thursday morning i had an emergency assessment at the psych ward (not admitted)... took a while after to get a therapist but had some intermediate supports, like a mental health nurse to tide me over the bad patches. just be honest about how you are feeling (part of you wants to do it, part of you is scared) and take it from there....
     
  6. zeppelinrule

    zeppelinrule Member

    Right now i'm talking to an ex girlfriend and feel totally cool. But right before I met my last bf on a message forum I asked about being suicidal and thought I was fine. But we split up (which I was glad about) and have been doing fine up until now. I do need help right?
     
  7. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    if you're feeling sucidal at all i'd say it can't hurt to talk to your doctor. he/she can ask all the necessary questions, like how often you think about killing yourself, do you have a plan or the means at hand, as well as other questions about your health (sleeping, fatigue, headaches) to help figure out if you have depression. if yr doc is any good they know what to ask and will make the right referrals for your specific situation, i think.
     
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