Im almost done

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Izzy559, Dec 19, 2013.

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  1. Izzy559

    Izzy559 Member

    Just dont know how much longer i can hold on i been holding on for years. But im at a point in my life where i just want to be at whole life has been a hell. No matter how hard i tried, no matter how nice i was to people no matter how positive i was, this world always ended up spitting back at me and im sick of it. What im feeling is not a emotion, all i do is close my eyes and day dream living in my imagination cause thats where im actually happy. I dont want cars, money, clothes, fame, women, or any of the typical american dream. All i want is to be happy and those things at the end of the day will not help me reach my goal. All i want is peace. I only want to keep living for my family but when i lose them (its close) i will have nothing, and nothing to live for. I do have the will to live but im losing it.
  2. MisterBGone


    Is there anything I can do to help you? You seem like a very nice person.
  3. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    Hi Izzy.. We will try hard not to dump and put anymore pressure on you!!! In my 66 yrs have felt like you feeling now.. Thank god thru those times and did get better.. We will listen, care and try to be there..

    Is ok izzy to let it out and say it here.. No need at all to put happy face on. You got any professional help now??? The rite ones can be a Godsend.. Can help a lot.. Dead is just turning into dust can have some changes which some of ca be for the better!!! Please stay safe out there, Jim
  4. SillyOldBear

    SillyOldBear Teddy Bear Fanatic Staff Member Safety & Support

    Izzy, I get it. I start having suicidal thoughts in high school. I'm 61 now. Lost my job, losing unemployment, am so very afraid of losing everything. Today has been particularly bad. But I try and keep going, because the option leads to the end of everything. The world will spit back at you. There is no doubt about that. But please don't let it win. And your day dreams, they are fine. We all have them. Just don't give up on the world outside of them.
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hugs to you hun the world can be cruel your right but it can be kind too hun look at all the kindness here please hold on ok hugs
  6. TheAce

    TheAce New Member

    Stay strong :)
  7. demuredawn

    demuredawn Well-Known Member


    first, yes... the world will spit on you, it will kick you when you're down, it will punch you in the gut just for good measure too...

    the world, in short, sucks

    you on the other hand, do not... and you don't have to listen to the world... or bow down to its antics. you can pick yourself up and tell the world to go screw itself.... and dust yourself off a bit, and keep pushing through. thats putting it all very simiplistic i know. and i know its not that easy. i'm not dumb. i've been dealing with depression 27 yrs myself. and life has kicked me to the curb and then around the block quite a few times. i'm not saying that its easy to pick yourself back up or even that its necessarily the right thing to do. in the end, you have to do what is right for you... but, dont do anything final without first making sure that you have tried everything to change your situation. have you tried professional help? if so... did you keep searching til you found one that actually worked well for you or just search til you found one, maybe two, they didn't work so you gave up? therapy is as much a search for the right fit as it is a tool to help you get better... you have to be willing to keep searching til you get that right fit AND to do the work they suggest or at lesat try it for it to work at all... if you aren't willing to do either one of those things, you can never truly say you tried it. have you tried making your lifestyle more healthy... both in eating, exercise, and in the social atmosphere of your life -- yes, cut out or reduce contact with anyone that is not healthy to you? have you tried things that you may see as possibly "ludicrous" ... things like relaxation techniques, grounding tecniques, coping skills, aromatherapy, chiropratic care, accupuncture, mindfulness, yoga, lucid dreaming, creative therapies... such as poetry, singing, instrument playing, listening to music, drawing, writing stories or journal entries, wood working, etc?

    can you truly say you've tried it all? have you had your psychiatrist (if you have one) try you on all the diff meds that may be beneficial to you?
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