I miss home. And I don't at the same time. I live 26 hours away. I miss my siblings. but I don't miss my verbally, physically, and emotionally abusive Dad. All the time I was at home, I knew that he hated me. He's a pastor, and I don't think the same way as him. Guess I deserve it. I keep watching porn and jerking off because I just want to feel loved. No one has hugged me in over a year. I just want a hug!!!! My youngest sis is the only one in this world that I think cares for me. She would get my mind focused on other things. Now I can't talk to her because Dad blocked me on her phone. She doesn't know, I can't get up with her. I work in construction, doing a crap ton of work 70-90 hr weeks. I don't have time to even be on here, but I need help. Please, I'm so alone. Why does no one love me? I don't cuss, or smoke, or drink. The longest I've had a girlfriend was 2 months, then she rejected me. I gave her what was left of my abused heart, and she broke it. I need a home. I'm alone in this apartment, needing to wake up in 5.5 hrs for work. I need people. I have no one. So I'm going to a random site to find people. Hello?