What is the point of living if just waking up in the morning is difficult to do? I'm losing hope in ever finding a job, I owe some woman R25 000, which I don't have. I can't help but feel angry with my father, because to a degree (and my therapist and my mother agree) that my father is at least partly to blame for this mess. I do get some money from my father monthly, when he feels like it and not enough to get me through the month, hence that I can't afford my medication. I know this must seem pretty lame, but it's been 6 months and I can't do it anymore. I even dream about my death.