I'm done trying...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Blood_Red_Soul, Nov 14, 2007.

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  1. Blood_Red_Soul

    Blood_Red_Soul New Member

    I am done trying to be happy, I am done trying to make others think I am happy, Every morning I wake up wondering is this the day? Will I finally get pushed that last inch that is holding me onto this existence? day after day I keep thinking tomorrow will be better, but week after week nothing except more disappointment and hatred come into my life. Let me tell you that I almost killed myself 4 years ago, failed, and made it up until now but these emotions are coming up again after years of suppression have held them down. I have felt strong until now where I am being over whelmed and I just cant take it anymore, I am sick of being a disappointment to my family and I am sick of trying...

    It's just not worth it
     
  2. twilightki

    twilightki Well-Known Member

    Don't suppress those thoughts, get rid of them. Instead of "Will I die today?" each morning, say to yourself, "Today, I am going to live". Stop trying to please other people, and stop caring what your family thinks of you. When it gets to the point where you're thinking about ending it, you have to take a step back and sit down, and stop caring. It may seem like a selfish thing to do, but focus on yourself. Try to make yourself happy. Once you can accomplish that, then you can focus on other people. How can you make other people happy, if you're not here to do it? :tongue:

    For four years you've held it together, four years is a goddamn long time. If you can make it that long, you can definitely make it through this.

    Tell me what's going on, maybe I can give you some advice, relate, or at least offer some kinds words.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 14, 2007
  3. Reki

    Reki Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear that man and I hope things pick up for you soon. I agree with twilight, don't place your value on what other people think of you, they can change their minds anytime. The only opinion about yourself that matters is your own.
     
  4. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    You do not need to suppress those feelings. You have lots of people here that are willing to listen. Sometimes just posting your thoughts can make them less threatening and a little more liveable. It wuld be a shame to waste all the effort yuo have put out for the last 4 years. Let us help you make it through the next 4.
     
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