I'm done.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ArgumentGuy, Dec 27, 2012.

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  1. ArgumentGuy

    ArgumentGuy Active Member

    1. A girl broke my heart. Used me and threw me away like everyone else. The girl I'm trying for now is nothing but a tease, who is also breaking my heart. Knowing my track record, those are the last chances I'll have at romance this decade.

    2. My roommate, who is the only friend I have in the state of Wisconsin is a demanding, controlling person who treats me like garbage when she's around. But she's never around, which means I'm alone more often than not. I don't do clubs, I don't do bars, and since it's a college town, there's nothing else to do around here where I can meet people my age to make new friends. So I spend my time alone.

    3. I have a chance to come back to MN early. But if I don't leave by early next month, I'll be stuck in Wisconsin until the summer because my roommate won't be able to find a subleaser. But it's far too little time for me to find a new place in my price range and pack everything out, especially since the people that I've contacted about places won't give me a straight answer. On top of all of that, my terrible job has a transfer program, which means I'd still have an income when I came back. But the only way that would happen is if I got a recommendation from my General Manager, which I won't get. The other managers like me enough, but he finds tiny little things to call me out on all the time. He's never paid me a compliment in the entire time that I've worked here. And if I did lose this job, again, knowing my track record, I'd be out of work for six months at least. (UPDATE to this situation: It looks like I've been fired. I forgot to call in that I was still sick yesterday, and since I didn't, they're most likely letting me go. Doesn't matter that there are several current employees that have done that multiple times in the past and are still working there; I make the mistake one time, and I'm done.)

    4. I'm drowning in debt, have a terrible credit score, and my rent has been late every month that I've been here. So even if I could find a place on my own, I wouldn't pass the application. And I don't have anyone willing to cosign for me.

    I have to fight tooth and nail by myself for everything that I have, while I watch everyone around me have the most amazing lives and get the most amazing things with almost no effort. Everyone else has someone to stand by them and support them through everything, while all I have are words on a screen. For twenty years people have been telling me that things will work out, and that things will get better. But they never do. They just get worse.

    So I'm done. I've had enough. I'm tired of fighting, I'm tired of the world taking a shit on me, I'm tired of being alone, and I'm tired of never having anything good happen to me. I'm done. Goodbye.
     
  2. midnightstar

    midnightstar Senior Member

    Please don't do anything to yourself, is there anyone you could stay with while you get back on your feet? :hug:
     
  3. ArgumentGuy

    ArgumentGuy Active Member

    Nope. i could live with my parents in the middle of nowhere, but I don't have a car, so i wouldn't be able to get back on my feet anyway. There are no more options.
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Come back to MN then let your controlling roommate find someone else to take advantage of hun You look after you now ok hugs
     
  5. ArgumentGuy

    ArgumentGuy Active Member

    I can't come back. I have nowhere to go.
     
  6. ArgumentGuy

    ArgumentGuy Active Member

    I'm ready to give up. I can't keep up the fight anymore.
     
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