Please Svava. I know it sounds like a cliche. But there is always a way out if you are determined to fight through. What is it that bothers you so much about life? Is it the stress of working as a lawyer? You don't have to work in a career that you don't like even if you went to school for it. There are many people who change careers throughout their life. Some become a teacher from an engineer. Some become a librarian from a lawyer. Some start their own business after working as an accountant.
Please, Svava. Never ever give up. Never ever stop working, fighting and keep striving. Say to yourself, "It doesn't matter how painful, unbearable, insufferable life may be. It is not about what obstacles I face but rather about how I deal with them. I am going to prove to myself every day that I give my all, try my hardest and keep living for my goals/ambitions till the final day of my life. I am going to prove to myself that I can always find a way out to move forward no matter how painful, unbearable and unrelenting the obstacles may be."
Believe in yourself and never ever even think of the words, "give up."
Take care.
-Hank-