What is there to say? Last week I stashed my prescribed sleeping pills for when the day came that I was ready to end all. I am afraid that time has come. The shitter here is now I don't know where the pills are, but believe me I will find them. I hope this doesn't take too long, but I have already looked in several places. So I am sure I should find it soon.
I'm so tired of life and I'm tired of dealing with it on it's terms. I can't do it anymore. I'm tired of being treated like shit. I am tired of not being heard. I am tired of all the general struggles that I without a doubt will always continue to face. I had finally found some support online which was good, but now it seems as tonite will be the last nite even for that. Not only because I am ready to end things, but because circumstances have come up that will twart this as well. It's how my life goes. It is so incredibly rare that something good happens but every time without fail something must crush that too. I don't want to try anymore.
I am so alone right now, and should I say that is how it will always be. There is just too much to overcome, and I am confident that it is beyond me to do it. More importantly to have to do alone. I am going to go now. I need to get back to my house and start looking again.
I don't know that I expect anyone to say anything really. What is there to say? I'm thinking not much if anything,but just let me be, to bring my life to ruin as it should be and will be. Take care of yourselves
I
I'm so tired of life and I'm tired of dealing with it on it's terms. I can't do it anymore. I'm tired of being treated like shit. I am tired of not being heard. I am tired of all the general struggles that I without a doubt will always continue to face. I had finally found some support online which was good, but now it seems as tonite will be the last nite even for that. Not only because I am ready to end things, but because circumstances have come up that will twart this as well. It's how my life goes. It is so incredibly rare that something good happens but every time without fail something must crush that too. I don't want to try anymore.
I am so alone right now, and should I say that is how it will always be. There is just too much to overcome, and I am confident that it is beyond me to do it. More importantly to have to do alone. I am going to go now. I need to get back to my house and start looking again.
I don't know that I expect anyone to say anything really. What is there to say? I'm thinking not much if anything,but just let me be, to bring my life to ruin as it should be and will be. Take care of yourselves
I