I'm done.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by xXxSomeonexXx, Dec 25, 2011.

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  1. xXxSomeonexXx

    xXxSomeonexXx Active Member

    I'm done trying. I'm done feeling like this. I'm done being tortured by me, my mind, and others. I'm done trying to accept my sexuality! I'm done crying and cutting every night. I'm done with these hallucinations and delusions. I'm done starving myself and hating the way i look. I'm done trying to fit in. I'm done doing so much for everyone and getting nothing in return. I'm done forgiving so easily. I'm done hearing all these comments in school. I'm done wanting help. I'm done being the nice one. I'm done being that one you walk away from when I'm explaining why I'm sad, but you say we're best friends. I'm done being the one you say you'll invite, but i hear about how much fun you guys had 2 weeks later. I'm done being that nice girl. I'm done forcing myself to try to like that hot guy. I'm done being talked about behind my back. I'm done being the only one that works on the project! I'm just done. I don't know if this means i'll start living and doing things for me for once OR that i'll stop caring about everything altogether and finally off myself one day. Most likely the 2nd, but who knows. I just want to be happy...
  2. Groznyji

    Groznyji Active Member

    Are you in high school? I hated high school. Life got a thousand times better in college.

    I have a lot of friends who are gay. Hell, my brother is gay. They thought life would be hard when they came out, and some of them DID have some trouble with it, but they're happy now. You should accept who you are. You'll pay a price for it in some way, most likely. But it's worth it.

    People won't like it, especially in school where there's so much pressure to conform. It doesn't matter. The people who don't accept you for who you shouldn't be worth anything to you, so why do you care about their opinion?

    And I'm ALWAYS the only one to work on the project! I prefer it that way. That way I know it gets done the right way!

    Things will get better.
  3. IntoTheWoods

    IntoTheWoods Guest

    Wow I could have written much of that - have spent so long looking after everyone else to the detriment of myself - here's to 2012 being the year to invest in us, to stop being what everyone else wants us to be and start being true to ourselves = hugs to you, you do matter.
  4. xXxSomeonexXx

    xXxSomeonexXx Active Member

    aww! thanks guys! And yeah i'm in high school, but 2 of my friends at school know i like girls. And one of them is gay, too (he's a guy) and i talk to him about it. He's the 1st person i told. But he's a year older and a senior this year. He's moving all the way across the country to go to college... I hope 2012 is better. It's gotta be!
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