I'm going to kill myself

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Spitfire, Mar 4, 2007.

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  1. Spitfire

    Spitfire Member

    I am probably going to kill myself within the following week. I have never even cut myself, but I have been depressed for two years. I am seeing a psycologist and he says I am at the emotional level of a 25 year old when I'm only 14. I'm asking my 3 friends in the world what will make them happiest and then I'm going to give them that. After that I will take my life. I just don't want to feel anymore, I can't stand the loneliness and the pain. If I leave I will never have to feel that ever again.
     
  2. birdy

    birdy Well-Known Member

    hey
    i know how it feels like to want to kill oneself. i dont want to play the psychologist, or want to make u feel uncomfortable. however would u like to talk about ur problems?
    many of us might be able to help u, we all have more or less the same problems, or had them, and can understand how u feel.

    oh and by the way: i think it's really sweet that u think about ur friends, even in such a time of darkness :smile:
     
  3. Beret

    Beret Staff Alumni

    Hun all i can tell you things are going to improve. Even so your psychologist claims ure on the emotional level of an 25 year old, you still got lots to live and please believe me things WILL get better. Just dont give up. Youre in my thoughts and prayers, sending much love, :hug:
    Beret
     
  4. Terrie15

    Terrie15 Member


    You got a pm :rolleyes:
     
  5. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    I hope you don't doing anything harsh. When we are in these states of minds, we don't think very clearly or rationally. Please hang in there. I am here anytime you wanna talk. My MSN is below ..



    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>


    l
    V
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 4, 2007
  6. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Wait on a minute Spitfire please i know how you're feeling like the majority of us here,don't feel guilty or like you're displeasing people and don't feel that by you going away you'll be making people happy because that's not true.Your pain and sadness is all very understandable and it is such a rotten and unfair feeling when we should all just be able to be living our lives without feeling so shit always for even nothing.Please talk to me even on msn if you like Milansteve@yahoo.com.au and the same goes for anyone else.
     
  7. GhostOfYou

    GhostOfYou Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry to hear you're going through all this.
    Please don't kill yourself. Killing yourself isn't going to solve anything, only cause pain to everyone around you and will certainly not make your friends happy. What will make them happy is to see you get through this, and I'm sure they can help you through it.
    There are ways to end the pain, but killing yourself isn't one of them. It is simply giving up, and not alowing for any chance of a future.
    Please don't let this beat you. stay strong.
    If you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm here for you. PM or msn me anytime if you want to talk.
    Take care and please don't give up. You're in my thoughts.

    -GhostOfYou
     
  8. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Please do not do anything too harm yourself. You are very young and still have many years that you can be prosperous in so many ways. Depression does not care who its victim is. I5 likes any mind it can find. It is what is making you think that this is the best way for you. It isn't. If you want to make life altering decisions, you need to make them when you are in a good frame of mind. You say you are going to ask what your friends want most and give it to them. if I was one of your friends and you asked me, it would be that you would be there to share the rest of my life with. Share the good times, the bad times, and all those times in between. Your life is way more important than any material gift. Let them enjoy the gift of you. :hug:
     
  9. AloneInTheDark

    AloneInTheDark Well-Known Member

    You said you were going to ask your three friends what made them happiest and then give that to them before you take your life? Surely what would make them happiest is you not taking your life at all and being there with them too. No matter what you give them it is going to mean nothing when you are gone, because it won't make them happy, because them will have to grieve. I know it's hard when you feel really low to think things will get better, but your only 14, you got alot of time ahead of you and there will be ups and downs, thats just the way life is. I'm sure your friends will be there for you if you just talk to them..

    Please don't do anythnig to hurt yourself,
    Here to chat if you need someone,
    Be safe,
    AiTD :hug:
     
  10. InnerStrength

    InnerStrength Well-Known Member

    hello spitfire

    I think it would help us if you elaborated more on the situation(s) that are making you feel so rotten. And I don't think killing yourself will make your friends happier, despite what you give them. I know you're going through I rough time, but try to slow down and think. Is this what you really want? Why are you depressed? Are there realistic solutions to your problems? I think those are the questions you should ask yourself.

    Just one "person's" view.
     
  11. Spitfire

    Spitfire Member

    Thank you all so much, I thought I was alone, my psychologist told me I have to be alone for now, but I think he was wrong. I had a breakdown today, I thought I was going to kill myself right there at school. I had to stop myself because if I killed myself one of my friends ( who is falling into depression ) would surely become as depressed as me. I just said I was sick and went home, but I couldn't stop crying, my mom figured out I wanted to kill myself and she burst out in tears. God the last thing I wanted to do with this was hurt other people. I feel like poison and I thought if I left everyone else would be ok. I just wish I could protect my friends from depression, I'm just not strong enough, I don't know how to stop someone comming down here. I wish I could take all my friends' pain and I could have it. But now I won't kill myself, because no matter how bad my family and friends have hurt me, I will never hurt them. Dammit why can't I save them from myself!?
    Thank you so much, I don't know how I'm going to get through school tommorow. I just wish I was stronger so I could stop them from feeling pain, I would die if it meant they would never know a single second of pain.
     
  12. Don't, please don't, you are 14 and have so much to live for, those three friends aren't even considered friends because they don't care about you but only about themselves. talk to me! :chemicalsreact-x@hotmail.com -MSN or email-
     
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