I guess I'm posting this because i just need to tell somebody. This is all I can think about right now. My son was born April of last year. He was not planned, or wanted (by me, sorry to use those words but they are true. He was an oops baby and I wanted to give him up for adoption. I didn't want kids and was not prepared to have one, I was only 19 at the time. But my mom and my bf (at the time) would not let me. Well, they manipulated me into keeping him. My mom said she would move away and be very depressed if i gave my son away. My bf kept saying he wanted to be a father. I didn't know what to do. my son was born and I have been raising him. This past month has been extremely rough on me for some reason. I feel like my life is over, I constantly worry about money and stupid financial stuff, i always have to cart my baby back and forth to daycare, i leave him at daycare all day because I don't want to deal with him. I like being alone and doing what I want. i hate being a mom. and now I'm single so it sucks even more. I never wanted this. I have decided that i am going to leave my son with his father and move far far away and start my life, my REAL life, without any family to tie me down. that is all they have done my whole life is tie me down, belittle and degrade me, never support or praise me, laugh at me treat me like i'm a weirdo. I do not care about them. my best friend is moving to Arizona this summer and i am going with her. i am 20 years old, that is something a 20 year old should be doing, not being a mom to a kid they never wanted. I am too selfish and self-absorbed to be a mom. I am miserable. I will be doing my son a favor. maybe in the future he will forgive me but I can't hope for that. I have made up my mind now i'm just playing the waiting game. I would leave tomorrow if i could but i have a plan that needs to pan out first.