I'm having one of the worst weekends of my life

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Blackbird33, Jan 1, 2012.

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  1. Blackbird33

    Blackbird33 Well-Known Member

    All I can think about is ending my life. I can't sleep, can't eat it's just a constant nightmare on a loop in my mind. I've been hurt so badly and I just want that feeling to stop.
  2. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    Can you describe the nightmare Blackbird33?
    Please keep posting and let us help.
  3. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hope you are doing better and resolve for the new year to explore with a professional ways to deal with how badly you were hurt...welcome and hope you find the caring and support you are seeking
  4. Blackbird33

    Blackbird33 Well-Known Member

    I went to ex's house to bring her roses and to apologize but when I get there she has another man in her house.
  5. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    Oh that's nasty.
    But she was not as invested in your relationship as you were. You can now try to move on, though.
  6. Blackbird33

    Blackbird33 Well-Known Member

    But finding out that person who loved more than anything was basically just using you is soul-crushing.
  7. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Been there, worn the t-shirt.
    Am afraid there is no quick fix :sad: time and good friends who will listen is the quickest way to get over such a hurt.
    Here you will find a friendly ear and friends, use us.
  8. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    You're important to us. Keep posting.We care, and you're among friends here. A lot of us have been in your shoes.
  9. Blackbird33

    Blackbird33 Well-Known Member

    There's a lot of self-hatred I'm feeling because the writing was on the wall long ago and I refused to believe it. I know I shouldn't be heart-broken over a person like this but this thought is little comfort for me. I don't how I'm going to handle returning to work or just dealing with the outside world period Im still barely eating and not sleeping so this makes it even harder to cope with daily life. I just don't know how much longer I can do this...
  10. Blackbird33

    Blackbird33 Well-Known Member

    Ive been hoping for months that emotionally I would turn the corner and just become healthy again. I've come to the realization that I am unable to connect with anyone and that I'll never be able to have a long-term relationship. I remember reading stories about a person who was found days after they died because they had no one and I feel as though this will be my destiny. All of my friends are moving getting married, having children, starting their own families. Than there's my reality of constant lonliness and as I'm getting older the few friends I did have are starting to move on to their next phase in life. Im trying to follow people's advice here and give myself to become rational but now more than ever I'm starting to realize that I want to end my life.
  11. Detergent

    Detergent Member

    Hey Blackbird. I know the pain of being used and abandoned by a loved one; I'm going through it too. I'm sorry this is happening to you, and I really hope you get through it.
    I wish I could offer some advice, but if I had any, I wouldn't be in this situation either. All I can say is, try to stay strong. If you need to talk to someone, I'm willing to listen.
  12. Blackbird33

    Blackbird33 Well-Known Member

    I appreciate your sentiments I feel that myself for lack of a better word is just unlovable. People like me up to a degree but I've never been able to cultivate deep and lasting relationships. Probably never those types of relationships in my life.
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