I "lost" my teaching job and had to move from China back to Australia. Back in with my parents, who despise me. My stepdad wants me out, I've been here a month. I'm sending out resumes in response to job ads, but no schools even bother to reply. Everyone who is not a principal of a school, even people in education says my resume is terrific, impressive, etc. But no one wants to hire me. When I got a job tutoring students for 250 - 300 $AUD a week, my family just asked when I could get a 'real' job. I've offered to pay rent but they won't take it. It isn't enough money to move out. The only place I could go is a hostel, I have no friends who will vouch for me to even rent a flat legally here. The move was really expensive, and I just found out today that the most important teaching resource, the book that could help me get another IB school and that can NEVER be replaced, was left back in Guangzhou. This last problem is the one that broke me. Constant low-level anxiety and massive depression is sending me over the edge. I know it's a stupid book but it's really a symbol of everything that's wrong and can't be repaired in my life. I want to get out of here. I want the utter despair to end.