I'm in hospital

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by Saiyanic, Jan 21, 2012.

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  1. Saiyanic

    Saiyanic New Member

    As I write this im in hospital. I took quite a serious overdose on <Mod Edit - Acy - Methods> and I've done quite a bit of damage. This isn't my first overdose, but i have been told if i happens again I won't survive it. This has left me with mixed feelings. I really don't want to be here anymore. I'm only 19 but i've gone through so much I feel like i've seen everything in life i can cope with and I just don't want to do this anymore. I've lost quite a few close relatives and I feel like i'd be better off being gone because I know i've never been as happy as i was when they were here and it feels more appealing than living does. At the same time, it shocked me. While i've had fairly serious overdoses only one has level permanent damage and was expecting either to be successful this time round or that i'd be okay and let out the next day where i'd try again. I've damaged up to 20% of my liver and I've damaged the lining of my stomach to the point it might have to be corrected by minor surgery and it has become ulcerated and I'm going to be starting a longish line of treatment tomorrow in order to hopefully heal my liver as best as possible. I've also burnt my throat from <Mod Edit - Acy - Methods>. I'm really not sure whether its idk, it might sound ungrateful but i'm really not sure I want to be here anymore and I'm scared that i really have no idea what i want out of life anymore. The pain is almost unbearable but Im not sure that its the damage thats hurting the most, my emotional state is crumbling and I just don't know what to do.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 21, 2012
  2. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    I hope you are able to work with the people at the hospital to see what sort of treatment would be best for your emotional state....I am sorry to hear about the severity of your OD, and I wish you a quick recovery. :hug:

  3. Tmacster1

    Tmacster1 Well-Known Member

    I hope you work well with the people in the hospital so that they can help you. I'm sorry to hear about the seriousness of you OD, also I wish that you have a quick and speedy recovery at the hospital. :hug:

  4. Iain

    Iain Well-Known Member

    I am so sorry that you felt desperate enough to have done this thing. I feel for you being in hospital, but hope that you will make a full recovery. I too hope that you can use this time to recover not just physically but mentally as well. Let the people in the hospital help you. I know it might sound a little trite but there is hope on the other side of these crises we go through. I am thinking nice positive thoughts for you today.
  5. Tmacster1

    Tmacster1 Well-Known Member

    I'm thinking positively about you today, and I know you'll make a quick recovery. I agree with Iain let the doctors and people in the hospital help you. It maybe hard to let them do so but in the end it'll be worth it. Also there's hope on the other side of the crisis's we go through. I know you'll recover :hug:

  6. Underground

    Underground Well-Known Member

    I know the OP quite well.
    He's at hospital tonight, been quite confusing to say the least.

    Pray for him. x
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