I Cant stop thinking about this. I have had a girlfriend for a while and i say to myself that i dont deserve her. Im 18 now and i cant stop getting flashbacks of the horrible discusting things i did as a teen. I dont belong here! I am getting upset about my past every single day and i even wrote them out earlier and just looked at them and cried for hours! This is what i wrote, i feel that they are so horrible they may even be removed from the forum. Im a horrible person. -(age-15-16) masterbated to my sisters -(age-15) Almost had sex with my younger sister -(age-15) Saw a movie about child sex abuse and masterbated to a scene where a young boy gets raped. (It wasnt child porn) -(age-16) masterbated to a gay rape scene i saw in a movie (not porn) -(16-17) watched lots of incest pornography -(15) had fantasies for older women (VERY OLDER) -(17) had sex with a girl i did not find attractive -(16) Got my dog to lick my penis untill i ejaculated I think about these and consider suicide the only solution. It was in the past and i regret all of it but the thoughts are making me so upset! I dont deserve a girlfriend, im a sick person!