Iv given up, i don't see the light at the end of the tunnel and all the other clichés of suicidal people. But I truly don't care about anything anymore, it doesn't help to see the people I care about leaving me while I sit here and wallow in self pity. I don't like to think about my problems because it just makes them harder to ignore. I'm so far past the point of caring at all about myself I don't even know why I get up in the morning. It hurts to reminisce on the past because all my faults and mistakes become glaring holes in my own existence. I hate the person I am and the person I was. I'm just so fed up with my life I don't know why I'm still here.