I'm leaving the forum now...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Yana, Nov 29, 2007.

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  1. Yana

    Yana Active Member

    I havent been here long enough to make any friends but I appreciate the few people who took the time to read and respond. It upsets me that so many more chose not to respond, but hey sums it up... I've totally run out of energy and hope and all the rest and so I must move on... I do wish all of you well and hope you find some healing for your problems.:sad:
  2. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    I'm sorry that you are leaving before you get chance to make a few friends here. I hope that the replies you did get were heartfelt and helped you atleast a little. Please take care of yourself and you are welcome back anytime you need to be here.
  3. Yana

    Yana Active Member

    Thanks. I've just hit a place where I really can't go on any more. I'm not going to be dramatic or emotive about it. Much as I'd like to make mates here I know I dont have any time.
  4. am I alive

    am I alive Well-Known Member

    Yeah, i know how you feel,I posted thread a few days ago and nobody replied,but it doesn't bother me(maybe i don't have a right to complain cause i don't often reply to other people threads ass well,i just choose not to say anything rather than say something which is not much helpfull,and beacuse of my bad language).I think its kinda normal cause people just don't know what to say,and if they do so it is always the same answer at the same story they read a thousand times before,sometimes it seems pointless to say anything. I am here for over a year and never made a single friend as well,i see SF as a good place to vent out when i feel so,and it helps me a bit. Anyways, i wish you well too,i hope you'll find a strenght to overcome your curent problems and never find a reason to come back again:smile:
  5. Up&down

    Up&down Well-Known Member

    Hi Yana,
    As soon as you post on SF you have made mates people who are going through or have been through stuff simular to yourself. I have not been around that long but have seen genuine warmth and help to posters.
    Sometimes when I come on here and read a post I think I must respond to that but then see one or two people already have replied I move on.
    When you say you do not have any time, I really hope this is because you are busy?
    Pleas keep posting it helps you aswell as other people who feel the same.
    Stay safe.
  6. Yana

    Yana Active Member

    Thanks to you both. Your really kind. I know its nothing personal when noone writes. I think we all propbably take it personally though when we are in 'that place'. I'm not very good at writing and dont want to make a fuss so nothing will ever jump out at people either.

    No I'm not busy. Quite the opposite. I am preparing myself to die right now. Its for the best. Its just hard because I have my daughter sat here and I have to make sures she is safe first. I cant cope any more and I think the kindest thing for everyone, and ok mainly me, is to end my suffering. There's only my daughter who'll be impacted anyway and she's too young to know anything. I've done her a book and photo album etc so she knows one day that I loved her.
  7. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    sorry that you are leaving yana, i havent been on much but i would like to think i would have replied to you hun.
    anytime you want to talk then i will be around

    please be safe

  8. Up&down

    Up&down Well-Known Member

    Please PM me
    You have your daughter with you, It will mess her life up forever if you do what you say.
    I once was in a bar and this fella came to stand next to me, I chatted to him and bought him a drink it was clear once he had a drink that he had problems & was homeless, I tried to move away politely but could not so I listened to him.
    He told me he came from a good middle class family everything was going well then his Dad killed himself.
    His Mum drank herself to death within a year, his sister who worked for a bank stole from the Bank to feed her drug habbit she got into to ease the pain, she then got two years in prison for theft and when realeased went on the game to fund her new pain easer heroin.
    His younger sister after the funeral sunk into depression disapeered and nobody has seen her since.
    He looked at me and said " I HATE MY DAD FOR WHAT HE HAS DONE TO US"
    He didn't know it but he has probably saved my life.
    Yana stay safe for your daughter.
    Keep posting. Pick up the phone ring your doctors, samaritans, anyone tell them how you feel,
    Seek HELP
    It will get better.
    PM me if you can.

    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 29, 2007
  9. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    I'm really so sorry Yana I didn't mean to ignore your thread thing's have been hell for a while,Please stay around we can talk or you can add me to msn if you like Milansteve@yahoo.com.au
  10. Yana

    Yana Active Member

    Thanks. I'm still here. Things have been delayed as I cant find anywhere to put my daughter safe without drawing attention. I'm here for a bit - well computer and email etc is on...so if anyone wants to PM me or if i can try help anyone in the time left then do feel free...
  11. Up&down

    Up&down Well-Known Member

    Seek help or at least sleep on things it's sometimes scary how things look so different tomorrow.
  12. ozinuk

    ozinuk Well-Known Member

    I too am at that place right now but the fact that I can write down my feeling and emotions and know that people take the time to read it is of some comfort. No replies doesn't mean no one cares it could simply mean they don't know what to say but understand all the same. We are all on the same journey here when we get to where we are going is the only difference.
  13. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    I hope you stay around and get the support you need, it just takes one person to change your life..I believe its not the quantity of replies but the quality, a reply that will help you to feel better about yourself, to give you some hope that may otherwise have gone..keep reaching out, keep shouting there's always someone listening and thinking of you.

    lost x
  14. Sashi0

    Sashi0 Well-Known Member

    By dying you will spread the feeling of hopelessness and misery to your daughter. Don't do that to her, stay and try harder for her sake. It's difficult many of us share the misery and understand-but please don't do it to your daughter. She is young and vulnerable, with time she might understand but that doesn't mean she won't be needing her mom. I know a lot of people that have lost their mothers due to reasons that could not be prevented (lung cancer, aids) but in this situation you are very much able to stay and be there for her. I wish I could say the right words to convince you to change your mind but all I can say are my thoughts on the matter. I am new as well, and I have made no real friends and many of my threads go ignored but there are people here that have noticeably been kind to us. When I say us I say all people that come here and don't know what to say or expect (newbies). Everyone starts off that way. :hug: Just don't give up yet, you have someone there needing you to live and shower her with love and vice versa.
  15. yana please speak to me... ihope ur ok , i am here all night and i am in that place
  16. kath

    kath Well-Known Member

    Yana i have not spoken to you before and i wanted to say hi and welcome.Also to you Floatingbetween as i noticed your reply to Yana's thread is the first you have made on this site and im sorry you also feel so low.If either of you need me im here as im sure are many others.Yana i really feel for your situation and am sorry i did not see your post earlier.i hope you are safe.i could hear the desperation and temptation in your post.Please let us know how you are.i may not know you as in having met you but i do care if that makes sense and i think we would all be relieved to hear from you if you are able communicate with us when you can.i may be selfish but your daughter needs you now and we would like the chance to be your friends please?You say in your post you are no good at writing but actually i find you very expressive and feel for you a lot.Truely you will be in my thoughts even if i only know you through what i have read so far.
  17. Yana

    Yana Active Member

    Thanks everyone. I'm still around obviously, but really struggling right now so cant say much...
  18. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    The important thing is you are still here with us. Please don't give up. Your daughter needs you. You seem to care about what happens to her. If you choose to end your life, it is something she will have to live with always. It will effect every choice and decision she makes in her future, if she chooses to live.
  19. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    You can't make friends on the internet. It's like a god dam library.
  20. crazychick

    crazychick Member

    I agree with it being like a goddamn library but disagree that you can't make friends on the internet. I met my best friend online six years ago and its a friendship that's lasted a lot longer than any of my so called r/t ones who sodded off when the going got tough.
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