I'm lingering on the sharpest edge...may trigger.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by riz, May 20, 2007.

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  1. riz

    riz Senior Member

    Someone I know committed suicide yesterday. He lived down my old block, just four houses away from where I used to live. We played when we were younger, but junior high changed that. I've never talked to him since.

    He hung himself off his balcony. One of the neighbors found him.

    At this point, no one knows why. He was attractive, popular, and a well-known athlete in our town. He had a basketball scholarship to his college for the fall and even though his parents were divorced, he had a seemingly good relationship with both of them.

    I actually cried when I found out. I briefly broke down when the reality hit me, and I had to make my friends think I had no idea why--but I do.

    Just a few days before I found out about him, I had been contemplating my own death. I've been planning how I want to die for a long time now. I've started to feel more and more helpless--but as I got the news about that boy, I started to realize how selfish it all looked to me.

    He took his own life even though he has a little brother that looks up to him and parents that love him very much. How could he do that to them?

    As I ask the question, I still think about how I want to go. Is that twisted? Am I really that messed up right now? Are my thoughts and desires about dying going to seem selfish to others?

    I'm ready to end it all. I can't even explain how easy it seems to just leave. What the fuck do I do?
  2. Sailor

    Sailor Member


    I would advice everyone in this forum not to end their lives. It's a sad world but it doesn't get better without the effort. We can change the world to be a better place.

    Strive for peace? Strive for individual peace. Our relationship with others, both the good and the bad, is important. Read biographies of people that suffered what you suffered. They can show you what to do.

    We can do alot of good. Whoever is in the heavens endorse on good things. Nothing can hinder good things. They last forever too. Make small or big difference in this world.

    Enduring is a big difference that you can make in this world.
    If you want help, help others. If you want to be treated good, treat others good.

    This is a hard thing to do, but with a foundation you can do it. Look for inspirational people that gained success by overcoming their obstacles.

    For example, I look up to Billy Mills, who was a native american who struggled for acceptance in society but eventually achieved success in the Olympics by believing in himself and overcoming. He now speaks to the youth to motivate.

    I look up to Jesus Christ. He's my greatest foundation.

    There are many of old generations that can show us the way. Good people that died in the past did not die in vain. Use them for your advantage to overcome your obstacles. This can be a sure foundation.

    A good foundation last forever. You don't have to die. You have to live.

    Whoever they are that are putting you down, stay away from them. Start listening to people that brings you up.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 20, 2007
  3. kirstyclive

    kirstyclive Guest

    please just keep fighting sweet... no matter how bleak it seems there is always a reason to keep trying
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