I'm new

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by onlyfornow, Apr 2, 2007.

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  1. onlyfornow

    onlyfornow New Member

    This is my situation:

    As a child, my mother, who suffered from depression, would often call me spoiled and worthless, and after being told that enough times, you certainly believe it yourself. When I was 11, i was molested and raped by my uncle who lived in the room next to me. This ended about 2 years later when he moved out. I didn't tell anyone what happend until 7 years later.
    When I was 12 I developed depressed and suicidal feelings, started cutting myself, and even made a haphhazard attempt at killing myself. When I was 14, a school counselor finally told my mom that she thought something was wrong. This made my mother extremely upset and just created general chaos. About a year later I was put into therapy and put on anti-depressants, mostly because I never opened up to the thereapist.
    I am currently off medications (my mom thinks the drugs are too dangerous) and out of therapy (my mom says its too expensive and i don't need it). Everyone thinks i'm better, but i'm not. I contemplate death all the time and I think i have started cutting again. I don't have anywhere else to go. Please help.
  2. Hereforyou

    Hereforyou Active Member

    Well welcome to the forums. I'm Joe, nice to meet ya.

    Hmm... I think you should sit down with your mom and explain how you feel about this. I mean maybe she doesn't know the extent of it and you need to educate her. Also we are all here to support you. If you have any questions feel free to ask.
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Hi and :welcome: to the forum. I am sorry you suffered abuse at the hands of your uncle. Also that your mother felt so inclined to make you feel like you were not worth anything. I hope you are able to find support here. Maybe we can help you to discover you are worth something. :hug:
  4. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to SF
  5. Beret

    Beret Staff Alumni

    im so sorry you were molested as a child and hope you will get here the help and suppoort you need.
  6. TwilightKid

    TwilightKid Well-Known Member

    Hi there and welcome!

    I have a very low self-esteem too due to all the bullying i have been through as a teenager. The kids from my class hated me and called me names and stuff. They kept on telling i am a sick freak, a weirdo, a psycho, etc. All just because i was extremely shy, quiet and almost didnt talk to any of the kids! So no wonder i have never been able to get rid of the feeling of total worthlessness. I still think i am a freak and stuff just coz they told me so and it will always stay somewhere in the back of my mind. Whenever i go it goes with me.

    So if u wanna talk just mail me!
  7. systamatics

    systamatics Active Member

    kiddo , u can improve ur life , and make it work out well in the end , these problems aint that serious , u can make it through i know it , not like me , i have nothing i can fite by in this cruel world,am like a soldier gettin into a battle naked with no weapon in his hand , and standing infront of the enemy..... i have nothing :(
  8. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Your mom may have suffered from depression but it would seem she didn't learn anything from it. I'm sorry what happened to you by your uncle. I hope he gets his just desserts someday.:mad:

    So meds are too expensive and you don't "need" therapy...:dry: Are you in a position that you have to live with your mom? Cause she certainly sounds less than helpful. Is there a calmer more peaceful place you could live? Another relative? A roommate in an apt? (depends a lot on your age and financial circumstances)

    Whatever you do, don't give up hope. There is ALWAYS hope, even if you can't see it at the time. Feel free to come here often to vent and scream and cry. We have strong shoulders and good ears. We're here to love and support you.


  9. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Welcome to the forum hun. I hope you find all the support you need here. If you ever need to talk you can message me or post about it in the forum. I hope to see you around the forum. Take care and stay safe hun, ok? :hug: :)
  10. blade

    blade Well-Known Member

    welcom egirl =D =D =D =D
    hope u settle here.
    names nichola bt ppl call me nic
    luv ya lts
  11. TwilightKid

    TwilightKid Well-Known Member

    thank u mate! but its not that easy at all. i have a social phobia and it makes the things much worse. but i will have to keep on trying, i know i will. and please dont say u have nothing coz there must be something good in ur life but maybe u just cant see it?? or, if there is really nothing, maybe after some time the situation will improve. u know some things just happen by themselves. what do we have? only our hope i think. be strong!!!
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