Im not mature enough

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Sardaukar, Oct 20, 2011.

  1. Sardaukar

    Sardaukar Well-Known Member

    I dont feel like Im mature enough to cope with life, for someone my age I have very little life experience. Most people my age have or at least have been in relationships, I havent, I wouldnt even know how to get into one. Ive never travelled alone, or lived alone, I just dont feel like I can relate to most people my age and above. I still daydream and fantasise about fantastical things, I dont know anything about cars or electronics, I dont go out and drink or socialise. I worry about this, I dont think i can cope with getting older, I dont know how to talk or dress or act. Yet I work in a professional environment, I have to dress like a businessperson, and assist taxpayers with tax issues, and I just feel like an overgrown child, helpless and at the mercy of all worlds predators, just waiting for an adult to help me. Can anyone help me, does anyone else feel this way?
  2. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I'm not sure if this will be comforting, but I can relate to what you are feeling. I am in my 20's and it is a constant struggle to prove my maturity, especially to family members. I don't always expect them to be encouraging, but I get so tired of their stupid expectations of me at times. The reason is because they never bother to consider that maybe I have my own set of standards that I am trying to achieve.

    I understand it may not be much, but I would like to believe that you are where you are at for a good reason. It's not easy, but don't necessarily compare your progress with others. There is too much pressure as it is in this world to meet high standards and you shouldn't have to feel bad or worse.

    I'm sorry if what I said didn't make much sense, but just know you certainly aren't alone in feeling like you're behind in life. If it counts for anything, I envy you that you're able to help people with their tax problems...that's a pretty cool thing :)
  3. Butterfly

    Butterfly Resident SF Sims Enthusiast Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    I often feel like that. I don't always necessary feel I have to prove my maturity as such but when it comes to placements/work I am treating people who are old enough to be be my great grandma and offer advice with many medical conditions and work with people a lot older than me. I often feel that as a 21 year old with minimal life experience I am not in a position to help these people as such. I am in a long term relationship but it is long distance as we are both still at uni, I still live at home with no money coming in since I am not well enough to be at uni or work, I rarely go out. I would have no idea about cars, how to go about getting a tv license, bills etc and I feel I should know these things at 21, and envy the fact other people my age have got their lives and shit together while I am still in a slump.
  4. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    My life was on the other extreme. Due to horrific abuse and neglect, I had to grow up very young, got my drivers' license at 16, and went to uni at 17. By 21, I was married and living away from home. Although it looks like a better existence, it was not. I wished I had a family that wanted me, a place to live so that I did not have to work since the age of 14 (and I came from a relatively financially stable upper middle class home, but I did not get anything I did not work for, which sometimes included meals). I paid 'rent' to my parents since I was 15, with part of my paycheck going to them (that was after they stole all of my money at the age of 13 to go towards paying for their house; and it was not a nominal amount as I saved every penny I could in the hope i could leave them as soon as I was able). I think a balance between the two worlds is best.
  5. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    Your position is just about identical to mine. I am 24 and still act like a child. I can't believe at times my age and I'm only getting older! My problem is that I have been very spoiled, pampered, sheltered, etc. All I feel like doing is staying at home all day, doing nothing. I left my job a few months back and now have to look for another one soon. Its not something I'm looking forward to, I am terrified of it. I'm especially scared if I get a job away from home. I've spent so much of my life cooped up in my house. I've missed out on so many experiences. I am not independent nor strong at all. I can't imagine living out in the cold world by myself. I feel that the day I leave my parent's home, is when I will finally commit suicide, when I have thought about it for over six years now. I think I haven't because I'm kept in check by living in my parents home, in this safe nest. The day I leave it, will be for me like a fish out of water. I'm likely more pathetic and in worse of a situation than anybody else. At least you can feel better comparing yourselves to me.

    I can't think of anything right now to make you feel better, I apologize for that. But I can let you know that you aren't alone at least in your position. Now I found that out as well, I am not the only one of my "kind". :)
  6. lachrymose27

    lachrymose27 Well-Known Member

    I also dont know how to actmost of the time... I try to be what i perceive to be normal but i feel i come off as weird anyway... After every social situation i replay the events over and over and over again in my head thinking how weird and stupid and awkward i was and this constant exaggeration is stabbing me and making me implode. I know where yourer coming from not knowing anything about cars. It makes Having a conversations difficult when you dont do the same things 80percent of what the other people do..
  7. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    I understand. For instance, I don't have an interest at all in sports. That doesn't help you in the U.S, especially in Texas where everybody is crazy about football and you don't even know what date the "Superbowl" is! That was embarrassing!