Im not sure...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Moose, Dec 4, 2007.

  1. Moose

    Moose Well-Known Member

    I have been having some girl problems...if you were on the chat room you may already know this

    But im confused now

    Do i love her or do i hate her?

    Im so angry lately that i cant see past it and i feel like taking revenge, which is wrong i know...its like a constant stream of anger that i cant control

    Well i found out she was goin out with someother guy until he said he didnt want to be with her anymore....while that was happening i was desperatly trying to get her back....her friend then told me that there was some other guy...:mad:

    And ever since ive been soooo angry
    so anyway i didnt tell her that i found out and she came back to me
    and i feel like im like the back up incase something goes wrong and it did so shes back with me :dry:

    i should be happy
    its been what i was working towards...
    this feeling of knowing makes me feel so bad
    Though its better than if i didnt know
    I think i love her...
    and i started minor cutting...i told her to try get her to help me as i had left the forum...but im back now because no one else will help me anymore
    She said i was stupid, selfish etc.:dry:
    and i feel pretty bad
    but like why should i?
    all points show i shouldnt and that i should hate her
    but some part of me forgives her...:unsure:

    and something happened with my friend yesturday that just made me even more angry
    but also something else
    When we were walking i felt like...kinda embarrsed to say it..but i felt like kissing him :unsure:
    I got nothing against gay people but...like i wasnt expecting that feeling

    I got this really bad urge to keep the thing goin between me and my gf until christmas where i would let her down hard...
    But then i think "no thats horrible"

    Ugh im just so confused...
    i wanted to post here just cause i felt like i need to....no reason acctually just wanted to write it out.....